


Crystalline

by theotpeffect



Category: DRAMAtical Murder - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Sex, Clear's Bad End, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Minor Violence, POV Alternating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-24
Updated: 2015-05-08
Packaged: 2018-03-09 15:37:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 34,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3255122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theotpeffect/pseuds/theotpeffect
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The world is full of uncertainties. But some things, with a little time, can present themselves with a burning clarity.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. This Broken Heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had this damn story nagging at me for over two months now. I wanted to complete my other fanfiction before I got started on this so I've been dying to work on it. Plot bunnies are no fun when they're pounding around your head and you're more than ready to do something with them.  
> Also, this takes place after Clear's bad route and, yes, I named this after the song on Clear's good route. Hey, juxtaposition already! But yeah, expect a lot of chapters named after lyrics in the song or maybe even lines in the fic will come from the song if an opportunity presents itself!

It was supposed to be the day that Aoba would become his, forever. After so long, Aoba would become the thing that Clear had wanted him to be. Knowing nothing but Clear. In between human and not. Just like Clear.

Just like Clear...

So why did he begin crying.

Aoba had even seemed concerned for him moments ago, before his body became still. 

"Hey... Aoba-san."

There was no reply. The room was entirely silent, except for Clear's shaky breaths and the patter of a single tear falling onto the cold floor below his feet.

"Hey," Clear said, desperation seeping into his voice, making it high and sharp. "Aoba-san." 

There was nothing and Clear knew that Aoba was dead. He was dead.

Because of Clear. 

Clear felt a sharp pain in his chest. But he shouldn't have. He wasn't human so this feeling of shards of glass, stabbing his insides over and over again and the feeling of having the place where a human's heart would be, squeezed, was something he was sure shouldn't be happening.

This was grief, in every way he was programmed to understand. It was painful and made all the worse by knowing that this was his fault.

He clutched at his chest and shook Aoba's shoulder in some pathetic attempt to wake him. Clear had done this when his grandfather had died. It didn't work then and it still didn't work now. He was helpless and this was all he knew to do. Even if he tried to pump Aoba's heart back to life it probably wouldn't have worked. Aoba had been torn apart. His vocal chords, his eyes, his limbs were gone. And he had starved himself, until he couldn't function anymore.

Clear couldn't even remember the last time Aoba had a drink of water. 

"Hey, Aoba-san," Clear said, his voice strangled, barely audible. "Please wake up."

But he didn't.

And Clear finally let the tears flow freely, even though he wasn't human, this pain was too intense to not have some kind of outlet. Not when he remembered every moment spent with Aoba until he killed him.

He remembered how in love he was with Aoba. He remembered kissing him in the rain. He remembered the first time he had taken off his mask and Aoba told him he looked like just like him. A human. He remembered the swell in his chest when he was told such things. He remembered when he deliberately damaged himself in a desperate attempt to save Aoba. He remembered when he was being taken away by his siblings and the only thing he thought about was The Jellyfish Song and how he wanted to sing it one more time. And how he wanted to see Aoba one more time.

There were a lot of things he wanted to do. Every single one of those things had to with Aoba. But that chance was snatched away from him. By himself no less.

It was his fault that Aoba was dead. As much as he wanted to blame Toue and his siblings, it was mostly his fault. He had been weak, too weak for Aoba and as a result he was dead.

And Clear wasn't sure he could feel love anymore. He wasn't sure he could feel anything anymore other than this all consuming pain. It made it hard to imagine that there was much else.

Clear slid to his knees and cried at Aoba's side. His tears tracked down his cheeks, every single one of them reminding him of the intensity of his grief and every jab inside of his chest, reminding him the intensity of the emotions he felt when he was with Aoba. When he was under the delusion that he was human.

But no human would ever do this to someone they were in love with.

Clear cried, for a very long time, with his knees on the cold ground and his arms propping him up on the even colder table that Aoba was lying on.

Time slipped by him. Every time he looked up at Aoba his tears would come in even larger waves and his pain gripped him tighter. But he kept looking because he couldn't take his eyes off of Aoba. Even after all this time he still loved him too much to look away. And he deserved the pain that he was feeling, because Aoba had probably felt far worse.

In his grief and self-loathing Clear barely heard the knock on the door.

It became louder, and Clear could sense the impatience behind the knock so he gathered himself and stood. He knew that whoever was behind the door wouldn't react well to a robot showing so much emotion.

"What is it?" Clear croaked, adopting the tone of voice he had used for so long.

"You're taking too long," one of Clear's siblings answered. "It's been all day are you _still_ working on him?"

Clear didn't answer. There was a scoff on the other side of the door before it was unlocked and opened.

Clear's sibling sneered at him and glanced at the table. 

"Your pet die?" he asked casually.

Clear grit his teeth and turned away.

"What of it?" Clear retorted.

His sibling laughed. "Are you  _upset?"_

Clear didn't answer. He merely stared at Aoba's body and tried not to cry again.

He cleared his throat and gathered his thoughts. He knew he shouldn't let them know that he slipped into a state close to how he was when he first arrived at the Tower. They couldn't know that he had become like that again because his emotions got the best of him and reminded him of how he was before. 

"It's an inconvenience," he said.

There was silence for a moment. "I don't remember you being so light about his life. But I suppose it's for the best."

He had to get out of here. There was no way he wanted to stay in such a place. He had almost been human before he arrived here. Almost. But now there really wasn't hope for that again was there? But Clear at least didn't want to stay. He didn't want to be reminded of what he had done here.

"I want another one," Clear said. A plan was forming in his mind. Even when he was the way that Toue wanted him to be he was still slightly different, slightly more sentimental than his siblings. He could use that.

His brother sighed loudly. "Really? On to the next already?"

"I like it," Clear said. "I found a lot about the human body this way. And I want another person to be loyal and pliable to me as Aoba-san was."

Clear felt the words were heavy on his tongue. He wanted no such thing. Not now. But he was sure he did, before he woke up. He was sure that he remembered liking when Aoba did what he was told. And when Aoba could speak he liked Aoba to say his name. And maybe before he could lie to himself and say that his name on Aoba's lips was beautiful and it reminded him of happier times. He could lie and say that Aoba saying his name filled him warmth and love and _that_ was why he liked it. But he knew it was a power complex now. Simple as that. 

Clear's sibling huffed. "Fine. I'll tell Toue."

"Tell him that I want to go out and find one myself," Clear said. "It won't do if he picks someone for me. They have to be just perfect."

"You're so goddamn picky," his sibling muttered. "Be glad you're Toue's trophy robot. He wouldn't allow you to do _half_ the things you're allowed to do if you didn't miraculously recover from that malfunction that made your emotive processing too strong and human like."

Clear laughed. "That makes me special?"

"Well, you recovered from some weird robot disease and made yourself less human so I'm guessing, yes," his brother said and left before further discussion took place.  

Clear waited for him to return. He was left with nothing except for the twisting pain in his chest, Aoba's dead body, and the cold. 

* * *

 

His sibling finally came back after a time. He believes it was a day. He wasn't sure.

He took long enough to allow Clear to wander the Tower -in places that were close to Aoba- and remember some things from his time here.

Every corner he turned down these hallways reminded him of times when he would rush through, excited to carry out plans that would make Aoba into what  _he_ wanted him to be. He couldn't believe he actually thought of Aoba as less than perfect, like he wasn't the way he should have been. Of course, he thought Aoba was beautiful at times but  _why_ did he think that there was need for Aoba to be changed.

He didn't understand his intentions anymore. He assumed he was just a heart less monster. A robot who didn't understand that he was killing someone. 

Clear  _does_ think that kind people can do unkind things, they're human, they make mistakes. And for the longest time he thought of himself as kind, or at least close to it. But now, he's sure he was lying to himself. He was not kind. He was a deluded type of kind, a fake kind. He was the kind that is only shown on the surface. When in reality he could cut off a person's limbs and remove their vision and their voice. He knew of no kind person who would do something like that. Especially if that person was dealing with someone they loved.

And at one point in the day Clear questioned whether or not he actually did love Aoba. Or if that closeness was mistaken for a yearning to  _be_ loved. He remembered when he first fell asleep after his grandpa died. He was mostly afraid of being lonely. Then Aoba's voice roused him from his dreams and he thought that maybe he wouldn't have to be lonely after all. He wondered if that was the reason he had been so taken with Aoba. Because he allowed Clear to forget that he was ever lonely. 

And when he returned to the cold room that Aoba was lying in he thought that maybe he yearned for someone to love him  _and_ someone for him to love at the same time.

But now he was lonely again. Because he had killed Aoba, the one person who made him forget that he ever felt lonely. But of course, he deserved this loneliness, this pain. An unkind robot such as him didn't deserve love or happiness. 

When his sibling came back Clear had begun wondering what he was going to do once he got out.

There was nowhere to go. Maybe he would bury Aoba next to his grandpa and fall asleep. For good this time.

"He said it was alright," his brother said and smirked. "He doesn't think that you're going to return to your useless state at this point."

Clear nodded. As if he understood. His useless state. If becoming human was thought of as "useless" here, he was very sure that he didn't want to stay.

"But just in case you have a week long time limit," Clear's sibling continued. "You have to come back, whether you found something or not. Here." he tossed a bag towards Clear and he held it out for examination. "It's a body bag. Get rid of your pet's body while you're gone. We'll notify you through your Coil when you only have one day remaining."

His sibling left him and Clear worked to get Aoba into the bag. It was a horrible job. Aoba was so light and Clear was forced to remember how little Aoba ate and his lack of limbs that took so much of his weight when they were gone.

When Aoba was secure in the bag Clear didn't seal it all the way. He left a little gap that showed off Aoba's hair. A faded blue, lacking the color that was there before Aoba and Clear had ever come to this place. Before Clear killed them both.

Clear left after that. He made his way out of the tower, disturbingly familiar with the building.

He reached the front door and left.

As he walked he kept looking down at Aoba's hair. As if it would tell him all the things that Aoba would tell him.

Would Aoba look at him in disgust? Would he run away? Would he cry and scream at him and hit him until Clear understood how much pain he had put Aoba through? Would he simply leave and never speak to him again?

All of those alternatives were far less painful than the reality in Clear's arms. With Aoba's limp form cradled against Clear's chest it was hard to pretend that he was asleep. Especially not when Clear had seen Aoba die himself.

Clear retraced the path that had brought Aoba and himself to the Tower what felt like millions of years ago.

He even passed Glitter but that proved to be a mistake because it left him wracked with sobs again. He could picture all the times he spoke with Aoba and made him food. He remembered the argument with Ren over calling Aoba "master."

Ren. 

He was dead too. Clear had asked about him when he came to, after becoming just another Alpha. He only asked because he knew Aoba was fond of Ren. He quite liked Ren, but at the time he didn't care either way. So when they told him the truth, that they had disposed of Ren because of he was outdated and no longer useful, Clear felt nothing.

But now he grieved for him too. As much as a robot could grieve.

He hugged Aoba closer to his body and cried.

"I'm sorry."

There was no answer. No one heard him or saw him cry. No one offered words that would help him feel better.

Maybe they had all run away in fear. Maybe they had all shouted to each other, "Look at the monster coming! Hide!"

Clear wondered if Aoba told the truth when he said that Clear had looked human. He must have lied, to make Clear feel better. He must have.

Clear finally exited Platinum Jail without having seen a single soul. The fact reinforced the thought that he looked like a monster. 

So when he got outside again he took back alleys so no one had to see him and made his way to the cliff where his grandpa was sleeping.

It was just as he had remembered it. Untouched with the same patch of grass that had a minuscule difference in color than the others, where his grandpa was sleeping.

Clear set Aoba down on the gently swaying grass, right next to his grandpa. And as loathe as he was to leave Aoba alone he went quickly down to the junkyard near the cliff and searched for a shovel.

He came back quickly. He wasn't about to leave Aoba until he was safe and deep under the rocky ground where he could be left alone. Where he could be untouched by anymore heartless monsters such as Clear. There were cruel people in this world, very cruel. Such as Clear and Toue there were people who were like stars about to burst. Heated and expanding, just waiting to eat up a planet that was orbiting around it, if it gets too close. And when they reach the breaking point there's chaos. Things are flung around, destroyed, even the star itself. It all becomes nothing, an empty void filled with the debris of the broken bodies of stars and planets and moons.

And Clear wants to protect what he can of Aoba from anymore of those stars and their heated fury. He had failed him in life but maybe in death the least he could do would be to protect his body from anymore harm. Even in death, Clear wanted nothing more than to protect him.

There was nothing else for Clear to do for Aoba other than to dig. So he let the monotonous work consume him. It turned out to become a great distraction from his thoughts. He would stick the shovel into the ground, lift, and throw the dirt over the side. He did this over and over again until he had a decent sized grave to put Aoba in.

The sight of it made him sad. For many reasons. It was small, like that of a childs, not something fitting for a man who was twenty-three years old. And it was the grave itself and all it meant. Graves were meant for dead people, obviously and Clear never thought that he would have to make one for Aoba. He never thought he would have to lower his limp form into the earth, never to be seen again. 

Clear guessed that that was true death. Never being seen by the people you loved again. Or not being able to see them either. 

Clear supposed that made him dead as well.

With that thought he mechanically covered Aoba's body with dirt and hoped that his grandfather would keep him company. 

When the dirt was packed over Aoba, securing him in the earth's embrace Clear sat down on the grass, his back to the setting Sun and stared at where his grandfather slept and Aoba's grave.

"Grandpa," Clear started slowly. "I'm bringing Aoba-san for you to look after. He's the one I'm in love with. But I killed him, because I'm not human. So I want you to look after him and protect him from something like me." 

After his talk with his grandfather Clear sat there for a while longer, ignoring the brilliant sunset taking place behind him. It hardly seemed worth looking at for the moment. Not when there was so much pain consuming him, ever present in the sudden stabs of glass coming at his chest. It seemed neverending and unendurable but Clear embraced the feeling with open arms. It was his punishment, one he deserved to experience forever. 

This is what made him sure that he wasn't going to go to sleep. It would be too easy to escape his punishment. He would stay a sentient being, drifting from place to place like debris after a star's explosion. And he would remain that way, with no source of gravity to give him purpose again.

Clear rose from his place in the dirt. It was time for him to leave. He knew now that in his final days Aoba had been afraid of him. There was no reason to stay with Aoba if all he felt was fear around Clear.

And Clear left, making sure to not look back, because it would be too painful. It would be painful to look back and see Aoba's grave, a point of such absolute sadness against the beautiful backdrop of the sky. He couldn't look back for fear of seeing his grandfather with a disappointed look on his face, shaking his head and saying. "This is why I told you to wear the gas mask."

* * *

 

Clear wandered for days. He popped into cities and junkyards, his head down. He never really noticed anything other than his two feet and the ground that moved underneath him as he walked. There were a few times when he lifted his head to find glassy-eyed people staring off into nowhere. He thought that very strange, but didn't meddle. He didn't ask if they were okay because he didn't have a new gas mask yet and might strike fear into their hearts as he did to Aoba.

So he left them be, standing in random places, or shuffling along with seemingly no direction. They looked like debris as well.

Clear finally could take ignoring them no longer and made his way to his grandfather's home. He wanted a gas mask so that he could walk around in public again, without the added weight of seeing a person's scared face when they saw him. No one had done that yet, but it was only a matter of time of course. And he missed the security of his lab coat, with the giant pockets that could hold his umbrella. There were more at his home, he knew.

He was yearning for some comfort. He was tired with grief. It was all an illusion, he was a robot after all but that knowledge didn't make the guilt any less heavy and the pain any more durable. He was hoping for the thoughts of Aoba's death swirling around his head to still at least for a little while here.

When Clear entered the creaky shack he was washed over with the sense of being _home_. Even though, he had said that he wanted to punish himself this comfort was addicting. It swirled around him and reassured him that he could feel numb instead of pained for a little while. He could recall the laughs that had been here, the happiness he felt when he collected another shiny thing to bring to his room. It was something he didn't even know he yearned for until he came here again. 

So he slowed his pace as he ascended his dust-covered stairs and made his way to his room.

All the pieces of glass there were much less shiny, covered in dust and cobwebs. It was musty and smelled of moth balls.

Clear sifted through his wardrobe until he found another lab coat and gas mask. This was the last back-up of the gas masks that they had. He couldn't afford to lose or damage this one until he found a suitable replacement.

Clear slipped the mask over his face, the familiar weight reassuring on him. His vision was a lot more limited this way, but it hardly bothered him, he had years to get used to it and taking it up again didn't take long at all.

He shrugged his lab coat back on, the over-sized thing shrouding him in the familiar material. 

He sighed, finally feeling some small sliver of content after so long. But it was short lived as he realized he should leave again.

So he slowly made his way back out of his home. He didn't think he was quite ready to leave. But he deserved to feel that uneasiness to be away from the one place that made him feel safe for so long. And he left, of course not looking back for the same reasons that he didn't when he left Aoba and his grandfather on the cliff.

Again, he continued his aimless march around Midorijima. He had made his way into the Northern district. This was someplace he hadn't gone to before. It was dirty, and unkempt. It was very obvious that this was the off limits place for every resident in their small island. Clear wandered, not particularly paying attention to anything other than his own two feet again.

Then he started hearing something. Voices. A thing that he hadn't heard in a very long time.

He rushed towards them. One of them was undeniably familiar. Clear hadn't heard his voice very often but it was unmistakable. It was deep, rough and commanding. It was Mink's.

Clear nearly ran towards him, forgetting about the punishment that he had assigned to himself because the comfort of being around something familiar had quickly become addicting. It was a comfort that he wouldn't pass up, so he flew towards the voices, his feet light on the ground, barely making a sound as he ran towards them.

He rounded a corner. Right to where the men were stationed. Mink was there, facing Clear and he was conversing with two other men whom he didn't recognize.

"Mink-san," he whispered, coming forward again. He couldn't help the relief that flooded through him at the sight of Mink. He was an embodiment of the life Clear had before he went to Platinum Jail. It was a comfort that he couldn't stop from allowing himself to get.

"Mink-san!" Clear shouted. Mink looked towards Clear, surprise flicking across his face as Clear ran to him.

Clear wanted to be shrouded with the familiarity like he was with his gas mask and coat so he slammed into Mink, hugging him tightly and burying his covered face into Mink's shoulder. He smelled of cinnamon, just as Clear remembered.

The two who were talking with Mink earlier were murmuring to each other but Clear didn't pay any attention to the words they spoke to each other.

Clear moved so that he was more securely against Mink, the sturdiness of the man making him comfortable again. Was he really so desperate for comfort as to find it in the embrace of someone he barely knew? He supposed he was because he began crying, quietly, but couldn't help the small jerks of his body as he held back sobs that threatened to escape his lips.

Mink sighed and patted Clear's back once before pushing Clear away from him gently.

"Looks like you're alive after all," Mink observed. Although, Clear wasn't sure he agreed with him.  

 

 


	2. Assets

To say the least, it was a surprise to find Clear in his arms after having for so long thought that he was dead. 

It had been nearly half a year since Clear and Aoba had gone to defeat Toue. No one expected their survival after the music started playing through the entire city. Mink, Noiz, Koujacku, Haga and Yoshie had been with Tae at the time. Tae had gone pale and yelled that they all should cover their ears.

Everyone obeyed, with more than a little confusion and the music started playing. It was muffled and barely there with the earplugs stuffed hastily into their ears.

They sat on Tae's couch, waiting for it to finally stop. It lasted the entire day, and most of the night. Just this incessant sound of music permeated through the Old Residents District. None of them dared go outside so they were stuck at Tae's until the music finally ceased. It was eerie to say the least. They could tell that the city was going through some type of change with Tae's anxious pacing and the strangely tangible quiet that crept its way behind the music.

When the music finally stopped, Tae made them wear their ear plugs for another day, in preparation for another wave of music. It never came. So, deeming it safe they finally ventured out into the city. It was nothing more than an investigation. The plan was to wait for Clear and Aoba to return and hope that they succeeded in their job. They really had nothing else to do than investigate at that point. 

Based off of the state of the outside world, out of the safe walls of Tae's house, there was no one. Well, not really. There were bodies, standing out on the streets, staring off into the void. There was no life in them and there seemed to be no other way than Aoba's Scrap to wake them up. They tried.

Koujacku, in a panic went off to find Mizuki but he had been touched by the music as well and as far as everyone else was concerned, he was beyond help. But stubborn Koujacku kept at it, ignoring that Mizuki was as good as dead. He tried everything, eliminating possibility after possibility until there were none. They had relocated to Scratch headquarters during that time, where there was no chance of being found.

They had been hiding there ever since. It was just their little group together with a few members of Scratch who didn't leave the safe confines of the base during Toue's experiments. And now Clear was with them, with no sign of Aoba. Mink was sure that Koujacku would pitch a fit, just as he did with Mizuki.

Clear wrapped his arms around Mink and began to cry. Mink could feel the small jolts of his body as he tried to stifle his sobs. Mink was sure now that Aoba was dead.

He patted Clear's back once and pushed him away. 

"Looks like you're alive after all," Mink observed. He turned and motioned for everyone to follow him back to headquarters. "We have some things we need to discuss."

They walked over the crack-ridden, decrepit ground, back to Scratch.

The Northern District was always a shit hole of a place but everyone had seemed to warm up to it pretty quickly once they learned it was their safe haven. Mink thought it was absurd that people seemed to find new homes easily. It had been years for him. He was sure he would never find a new home, not even in Scratch.

When they arrived they immediately go to the main area of headquarters, where Mink had taken Aoba on their very first meeting. No one was there, which was no surprise considering how late it was.

He turned and stared down at Clear with crossed arms.

"Aoba's dead," he stated. "Why?"

Clear tensed and began backing away. One of the Scratch members, a lanky man, pushed Clear back to his original position. Clear was of average height but the way he shrunk in on himself made him seem much smaller.

Mink stared and sighed. He turned to the two Scratch members that had accompanied him outside. "Get the others."

The boys nodded and hurried to obey, scurrying off to the branches where everyone's rooms were located. They were packed together closely, so it wouldn't take long to round everyone up. It could be a liability Mink supposed but in situations like this it was very convenient.

Mink turned his gaze back to Clear, scrutinizing his shuffling feet and hunched shoulders. Even with not having known him for very long or very well Mink could still detect the sadness and guilt rolling off of him in waves. It was sharp and damn near tangible and the mention of Aoba seemed to have made it even worse.

He left him to his grief and instead waited for the others to arrive, assuming it would be better if they were all there to hear about the fall of their greatest asset. Then they could formulate a plan together about what to do next. Mink always liked planning things on his own but he was finding that this new group of people that he had gotten himself stuck in had a tendency to want to work together. It was a nuisance at times but took some of the burden off of his shoulders. They still looked at him as a leader though. He was usually the one who took initiative and they were staying in his place after all. Why shouldn't they follow his orders?

The time they waited passed in silence. It was obviously uncomfortable for Clear, but Mink didn't mind it. It gave him time to think, time to plan what he was going to propose to everyone they should do. Aoba was his biggest bet, especially since the revelation about his power of Scrap. He was the primary plan that Mink had to defeat Toue. Then he ran off with Clear and had to die. Mink was at a loss of what he should do. But that didn't mean he was going to give up. No, he had waited far too long to see Toue dead to give up so readily. He just had to be patient and wait for something to come to him. He was enough of a quick thinker to not be too worried about it. He didn't have a time limit either as far as he knew. The whole island of Midorijima was under Toue's control. Mink assumed he wanted to expand but that probably wouldn't happen for some time.

Maybe after Clear revealed what had happened to them Mink wouldn't be so uncertain. He had a feeling that some interesting things had gone on during Aoba and Clear's absence.

The first people to show up were the Scratch members. They had no problems with following Mink's orders promptly. The others Mink was still trying to break of doubting his leadership. They asked too many questions, took too long to do what he said. So it was no surprise when they were the last ones to show up. First was Haga and Yoshie who were far too afraid of Mink to dawdle as much as the others. Then Tae and Koujacku revealed themselves some time later, dragging along a pissed off looking Noiz.

Once they caught sight of Clear, Koujacku and Tae immediately came up to him and asked about Aoba.

"Sit down," Mink ordered, staring hard at each of them in turn. They glared at him but went to join the others, who had situated themselves around the room. Noiz trailed after them and nodded to Clear before taking his place next to Koujacku. 

"Gas Mask is going to tell us what happened to Aoba," Mink announced to his group and turned to Clear once again. He nodded his head, prompting him to speak.

Clear shook his head and began backing away again. Mink grabbed his arm and forced him to stand in the middle of the room, so everyone's eyes were on him, locking him in place.

Clear took a deep breath and repositioned himself so he was facing Tae and Koujacku, the people who wanted to know about what happened to Aoba the most.

"Aoba-san is... dead," Clear finally said.

There was a moment of silence as the audience processed this new information. Yoshie was the first to react, wailing loudly and burying her face in her hands. Haga wrapped an arm around her shoulders and patted her gently as she cried.

"He was such a good boy!" she kept saying, over and over again.

Noiz seemed confused as if he didn't understand how he felt about this. Tae remained quiet, pursing her lips and clasping her hands together in front of her.

Koujacku, however, stood straighter and snarled. "You're lying. Aoba wouldn't leave us."

Clear shook his head and raised a hand over his covered face. He was crying, softly. So softly that Mink, who was right next to him, was sure he was the only one who could hear it.

"Calm down, Red," Mink said and addressed Clear next. "What happened?"

It took a while for Clear to get a hold of himself. He was in no state to relay a story, much less one that clearly brought him back to a bad place. But Mink knew getting information from Clear was more important than his amenity.

Mink stared impatiently at Clear, awaiting an explanation about what had happened when he was away. Everyone else was waiting just as impatiently for an explanation. Especially Koujacku who had been impatient from the start and was proving to be worse with each passing second. Tae gripped his arm, keeping him in place.

Clear still didn't speak with the many irritable eyes fixed on him and Mink leaned down to whisper on his ear.

"Tell us what happened," he growled.

Clear, jolted by Mink's words, nodded once, slowly.

Clear lowered his head and prepared himself. He squared his shoulders, sniffled and cleared his throat.

"I killed him," Clear said. It was quiet. So quiet that no one heard him other than Mink, just as he had heard him cry. Then he repeated himself, loudly, by shouting into the room _"I killed him!"_

Mink had never seen someone so broken outside of the man in his mirror.

No one moved, except for Tae who left the room, releasing Koujacku from his binds. 

Koujacku was obviously enraged. Anger, pain and sorrow all swirled behind his dark red eyes, accumulating into a palpable rage that curled off of him. Shown in his closed fists and his bared teeth.

He lunged at Clear, reaching out with his hands as if he wanted to break the already irreparable person in front of him.

Noiz grabbed him and dragged him back upon noticing Mink's cold stare. 

"You fucking monster!" Koujacku cried. His face was twisted and pained. "We trusted you with him you piece of shit."

Noiz struggled with pulling him back, faltering at times when Koujacku surged forward.

"Red!" Mink boomed. He waited for Koujacku to acknowledge him with a small flick of his gaze. "Get out."

Koujacku growled and addressed Mink. "You can't just let him get away with this. No one should get away with murder."

"He's an asset," Mink explained.

"He killed Aoba!" Koujacku shouted. He yelled in frustration and turned on his heel and left.

Mink sighed and gestured at Clear. "Continue."

Clear shook his head and hugged himself. "There's nothing else to say, Mink-san." 

Mink observed the rest of the room, full of people who felt awkward about the events that had just transpired. Only Mink's Scratch members remained. The others had left, presumably to grieve in private. Leaving Clear alone, in a room full of strangers. Maybe if he moved Clear away from them then he would feel more inclined to describe what had happened.

Mink clasped Clear's shoulder and steered him back to his room. Clear didn't resist him once during their walk. He didn't even question where they were going. Mink was sure that he was going to be pleased with the Clear that was at his side. Quiet, followed orders. The only obstacle would be getting him over Aoba's death. After that he could be very useful. Of course, this all depended on what information he had to offer to Mink.

Mink entered his room and immediately got to lighting his pipe. He sat on his bed and gestured with one hand for Clear to talk.

Clear shook his head. "W-what do you want?"

"Talk," Mink ordered. "What happened? Other than Aoba."

Clear fidgeted in his place and slowly began to speak. He recounted everything he had done there. From the time they first stepped into Platinum Jail to the time that Clear had spent changing Aoba. He even revealed that he was a robot, one of Toue's design. He relayed everything with a monotone voice and Mink listened, never letting his true emotions slip past.

He took note of Clear being a robot. It was valuable information, along with the fact that he seemed to be Toue's pet since he was allowed so much freedom. He tucked Clear's time limit in the back of his mind and Clear's ability to take over a person's mind with his singing.

By the time Clear finished Mink had made up his mind. Clear was a very valuable weapon indeed.

* * *

 

Mink had been asleep, as close to sleep as he seemed to get these days, when he was woken up by a frantic banging on his door.

He sighed and rolled out of bed. He didn't bother with putting on any of his cuffs or his contacts. It was far too late to deal with that and the person on the other side of his door didn't sound like they would like to wait. Whatever it was must have been urgent.

Mink cracked open the door and growled. "What?"

One of the Scratch members that Mink recognized as someone who was doing rounds that night was on the other side of the door.

"Um- it's about the guy that came in today," the Scratch member said. Mink raised an eyebrow and the other guy continued on. "Well, I thought it was weird that I didn't see him around in any of the bedrooms and as I wandered some more I didn't see him anywhere else. So I actively started looking for him. And, well, he's gone."

Mink cursed under his breath.

"Get Noiz," Mink ordered, a plan formulating in his mind. He could get Noiz to track Clear's Coil and speak to him that way.

Clear was a robot that was favored by Toue, they couldn't lose him, not when he was such a great tool.

The Scratch member scurried off to get Noiz and Mink turned to at least get his contacts in before he met with Noiz.

Mink waited in his room, fully dressed except for his cuffs which were still neatly packed away.

Noiz came in, looking pissed at having been woken at such a late hour.

"The hell do you want?" he grumbled, leaning against the wall. His clothing and hair were rumpled and he seemed like he was going to practically fall asleep standing there.

"Gas Mask is gone," Mink explained. "Track down his Coil and contact him."

Noiz scoffed. "Couldn't this have waited until morning?"

Mink let him complain and left him to do what he needed to as he worked over the glowing screen hovering over his wrist. Mink crossed his arms and leaned back on his bed. he watched Noiz intently and waited.

After a time Noiz finally sat back with his Coil making the noises that indicated he was making a call. Mink shifted and crouched down behind Noiz, waiting expectantly for Clear to pick up.

Just as the call was about to drop Clear's masked face showed up on the screen. It looked grainy with their bad signal but the person on the screen was unmistakably Clear.

"What are you doing?" barked Mink. 

"Mink-san," Clear said. He sounded tired. "I have to go back to Oval Tower."

"Why?" Mink questioned.

Clear sighed. "The time limit. I got a message saying I had to be back by tomorrow a little after we got done talking to each other. I decided it was best to just leave since I had made everyone angry with me anyhow."

"You have to come back here," Mink ordered. "We could use you when we go against Toue. Don't you want revenge for what he did to you and Aoba?"

Clear shook his head. "He would come after me if I didn't come back to him by the time I needed to."

"What exactly did you tell him you were doing out here anyway?" Noiz asked curiously.

"I told him I was finding someone else to experiment on, since Aoba was dead," Clear said bitterly.

Noiz whistled. "Damn."

Mink moved closer to the screen. "Find a way to get back here."

Clear sighed. "I'll try."

"Come back in two days," Mink said. 

The call dropped and they were left in Mink's dark room without the light of the Coil.

Noiz yawned and stood up, stretching and popping a few of his joints in the process. "I'm going back to sleep," he announced.

He padded out of Mink's room, shutting the door behind him.

Mink breathed out slowly. He stood and decided he was going to take a walk around headquarters.

 

 


	3. Debris

Clear's feet scraped across the worn ground, that led him back to Oval Tower. The way back seemed to be longer than the time that he spent walking away from it. The road seemed to stretch on forever in the way that his original freedom made it seem that he had forever to wander. The message from his Coil jolted him back to reality though. He had forgotten about his obligation to return, it seemed like a dream, even though he had told Mink about it.

Now he was stuck going back. There was no where else to turn anyhow. With the others having known that he was alive, in every way but his want to live, it was even more imperative that he leave. Toue would find them and realize that he had been fraternizing with people outside of the Tower, rebels no less. There was no way that he was going to get everyone he knew in danger. He had already killed Aoba and weighed them with their own grief, there was no need to turn them in to the jail underneath Oval Tower where they would have to rot until they finally died. 

Clear kicked a pebble that he had been chasing along his dreary path. He kicked too hard however and it went shooting across the street. He didn't think it was worth running to get so he decided to leave it and continued on back to the Tower with little distraction.

Without the pebble there his feet seemed to be less occupied and they moved quicker, not of his own volition. He was nearly there. He was in Platinum Jail at the moment. He had come in the way he had with Aoba so long ago. He thought it was strange that he kept gravitating to areas where he and Aoba had come across together. He would look at a building, or alley and think to himself how nice it would be if Aoba would be with him. Then he would smile. Or there were other, horrible, times when he thought that it was a good thing that Aoba was gone. He knew their little world was horrible at the moment, but he wasn't sure that was cause for being grateful for someone being gone.

Their hopeless world was something that a person could thrive in if they tried hard enough, wasn't it? Wasn't it?

Clear looked up at the Tower looming over him, causing him to crane his head back, to look at it in its entirety. It was a large thing, fit for a man to look down over his city from the highest windows and grin at the success of his take over. Clear didn't see the point of just  _looking_. If he had taken over a world for himself then he would walk around. He would sing and hold Aoba's hand and kiss him whenever he wanted. The others would also live happily. Koujacku would never have lost his best friends and Noiz and Mink would be able to find their happiness as well. Tae would have her grandson and, maybe, if Clear and Aoba felt like taking in a child she would have a great-grandchild. Haga and Yoshie would never have lost a friend either. No one would have lost a friend and they could have all been happy.

But instead they weren't. They were far from happy and Clear was looking up at the man hidden in the Tower, possibly laughing at all of them and their misfortune.

* * *

Once Clear entered the Tower, from the main entrance, he was plagued by his siblings. Two of them, the ones who seemed to bother him the most since the beginning of his time here, swarmed him.

"Hello, big brother," one of them said in a sing-song voice.

"Did you find someone?" the other asked.

Clear shook his head. "I need an extension."

His siblings laughed, like that was the funniest thing they had heard all day.

"Toue was already lenient with you in allowing one week," the first sibling said.

"What makes you think that he would give you more time?" the second asked. 

Clear swept past them. "Because he's already done with taking over the island what use does he have of us now, other than amusing him with our running around the Tower."

His siblings were silent and watched him go before muttering to themselves. Clear didn't pay particular attention to what they said but he did gather that they were wondering what the outside was like, since they hadn't left Oval Tower since Aoba's and Clear's capture.

Clear knew, that deep down, they knew there would be no more use of them for a long time. 

* * *

 

Clear strode past many of his other siblings as he made his way back to Toue. None of them stopped him or questioned him, even though he had never gone this far into the Tower before. And they were all familiar with him. He was the only one of them who wore the over-sized clothes that he did and the only one of them who spoke the way he did. He was unique among them, he would admit. At least, on the surface. In reality, they were all the same lost souls, trapped in the Tower with nowhere else to go.

Across the white, marble floor Clear walked, until he was finally in front of the great double doors that he had no idea he despised until he looked on them once again. He almost wanted to laugh at the absurdity of hating doors. But he realized, it probably wasn't the doors he hated. He hated where they led.

Clear swung open a door, without bothering to knock. It was heavy and didn't go as far as a normal door would have under their weight. They halted slowly, gliding over the marble. Only then did Clear enter the room. It was cold to him, even though he didn't have his physical sensations turned on at the moment there was a biting cold that seemed to swirl about the room. He wondered how Toue could stand being in such a place all day. He wondered what Toue even did up here other than laugh at the ants underneath him. 

Toue looked over his shoulder at Clear, as if he had been expecting him to show up at his door.

"You didn't bring anyone," Toue observed. "So you want to stay outside longer?"

Clear nodded and stood straighter, looking into Toue's eyes. He wasn't sure if this was something that he would have done when he was staying here, he didn't remember. To be honest, he didn't remember much outside of Aoba. His laugh, his smile, his eyes. It was as if Clear had never been alive before he had met Aoba, because he didn't remember anything other than Aoba since he was woken by his master's voice once again.

"There's hardly anyone out there that's as perfect as Aoba-san is," Clear said.

"Is?" Toue asked, turning back away. "And you want someone with a similar body?"

"I meant there's no one out there who does what I say as perfectly Aoba-san did," Clear explained. "I want to see if I can turn them into me. I don't want to be stuck with someone who I don't want to be with forever."

"You don't want to be alone," Toue said thoughtfully. "You are  _very_ interesting."

The corner of Clear's mouth twitched. He didn't answer, instead deciding to ask the question directly.

"Can I have more time to find my replacement? One week isn't sufficient," Clear said.

Toue didn't turn away from the wall he was facing. Clear watched his back, as they stood in silence, and waited for him to say something.

"You won't go over seas," Toue said decisively. He looked towards the other side of the room, towards a door tucked away in the corner. "If you find someone you like and they need to be fixed bring them here. We have someone who could help you with that certain predicament. Take as much time as you need."

Clear turned on his heel and left. He didn't bother to close the door as he walked away. He would leave it to someone else to get to.

As he walked through the Tower again he heard his siblings whispering to each other in the hallways, stealing glances at him and letting out very loud and obviously exasperated sighs.

"He always gets to do whatever he wants."

"How come he's the only one who gets to go out?"

"What do you think he does to get in Toue's favor so much?"

They hissed underneath their breath these words and turned away from Clear as he made his way towards some of them. None of them bothered to speak to him, instead passive-aggressively whispering loudly to each other about how much of an outsider Clear was and that he didn't deserve the treatment that he was getting.

Clear was inclined to agree with them. But at least now he could follow Mink's orders and get back to Scratch headquarters without any more delay.

He found himself not wanting to displease Mink. And not because of some profound bond that tied them together as it had with him and Aoba but rather because Mink had taken him in when he was wandering. He hadn't shoved him away roughly when he was looking for comfort and he had listened to Clear when he had spoken. Mink was the only one who had treated him with any kind of kindness when the others were surely angry with him for killing Aoba. 

Mink was the only one he had left.

* * *

 

Clear hurried to get back to Scratch headquarters. He didn't want to stay away from Mink for too long. He was expecting Clear to return soon.

He ran back with a determination that spoke for him how much he wanted to keep Mink close. Clear really was lonely and the only one he could think to turn to after Aoba's death was Mink. He let the thought that he was being misled in Mink's feelings towards him flit across his mind a few times but he pushed them back, because the reality was that he didn't care. He would suffer for someone who didn't mean to care for him back because he was lonely enough to just want someone that would expect him to come back at the end of the day, no matter the reason. 

It took longer than Clear would have liked before he was rounding to the hidden entrance of Scratch. It was nothing special in the Northern district. It was another, gray, crumbling building set right in the middle of the district, where very few dared to venture. He entered into the building and made his way to another entrance, hidden away by a large piece of the ceiling. The door was set behind the rubble just enough for the entrance to be hidden yet usable. 

Clear slipped behind the door and descended into the dank basement where headquarters was. He passed a Scratch member there who nodded to him and escorted him to Mink's room, saying that Mink was waiting for him.

The member wordlessly left Clear after showing him to Mink's room. Clear waited there for a moment and breathed out heavily before knocking on the door. There were boots that clunked heavily across the floor before the door was opened and Mink was revealed on the other side of the door. He nodded his head and moved to the side so Clear could enter.

Shakily, he came inside, afraid that Mink might have been mad at him for leaving after all. He had seemed so at the end of their call yesterday but Clear thought that might have been a passing thing, a temporary human emotion that would dissolve as soon as it came around. Maybe anger wasn't so simple as happiness or excitement or some other emotion.

Mink closed the door behind the both of them and stood in the middle of the room, smoking his pipe.

Clear observed his room, not having previously been there. It was small and the ground was made up of worn tile that peeled away at some of the edges. A small bed was placed in the corner where a lone light bulb hung above it, providing the room with its scant lighting. On the opposite wall of the bed there was a table set up, holding candles, as well as jars and a cloth with strange patterns that Clear hadn't encountered before. Above that was a small tapestry that had the same patterns woven across it. But that was the only source of decoration around the room. There were a few shelves, hanging on the walls but they held nothing but small, empty, cardboard boxes and a handful of books, messily piled on top of one another.

"What did Toue say?" Mink questioned. Clear turned, giving his full attention to Mink.

"He said that he would allow me to come back out and find what I needed to. There's no time limit this time and we have an agreement that I won't leave the island," Clear said.

Mink nodded and crossed his arms. Clear noted how corded they were, bulging out of the tight sleeves of his coat.

"Did he know you were here?" Mink asked.

Clear shook his head. "He didn't say anything about it, so I don't think so."

Mink nodded again. "Go now. Get someone to show you a room."

Clear shook his head. "I don't need a room, Mink-san. I don't sleep."

"It's somewhere you can return to," Mink said and walked past him towards his bed, ending their conversation.

Clear went out into the hallway and just as he was about to close the door stopped himself.

"Mink-san," he said tentatively. Mink looked at Clear from his place sitting on his bed, acknowledging that he was called. "Thank you. For taking me in, even after learning that I killed Aoba-san."

Mink grunted and Clear finally closed the door all the way, cutting off his view of Mink, and leaving him there alone. 

Clear, unsure of where to go wandered aimlessly. There was no one that he knew and no one who wanted to talk to him so he walked around headquarters, with heavy, tired footsteps.

He wondered why he was so tired. He was a robot, he didn't require sleep after all. It was something that humans needed, not Clear. The only time he had ever slept was after his grandpa died, but that was because he thought he had no one. He had Mink didn't he? If only for a little while, he had a shallow relationship with Mink that could become something else. Maybe not what he and Aoba had, that was special and no other relationship that Clear would have would ever change that. But Clear felt in his heart something go out to Mink.

They were the same pieces of debris, floating around space aimlessly, alone in the infinite darkness. They were both lonely. And Clear felt in the way that Mink held himself when he thought no one was looking, like a tired man far older than his actual age, and the way that he preferred loneliness over the company of any thing, that Mink was being weighed down by grief too. Clear could detect his grief because it was something he was familiar with. He could see the signs and was able to feel its small quantities mixed in with the everyday emotions of humans.

Clear wandered, thinking it strange that of all the times he was sure that he wasn't human he still felt his grief and his loneliness piercingly clear in his heart, as any human would. Yet he wasn't human. He was something man-made, underneath his skin would be gears and cogs making him work. And he had gotten the privilege of feeling these negative emotions swirl in the hollow cavity of his chest every day since he had committed his crime that turned him forever.

Maybe the fondness he felt for Mink was a counterfeit emotion, something he had picked up in his time with Aoba, when he was the closest to human he ever thought he would reach.

He was walking with his head bent down when a pair of footsteps made their way down the hallway, before making an abrupt stop. Clear lifted his head and was greeted with the sight of Koujacku, standing on the opposite side of the dim hallway. He began to back away when someone else shoved him forward.

"Why the hell did you stop, old man?" Noiz asked, trying to get him to move. He peered down the hallway where he also spotted Clear and froze. He sighed and let go of Koujacku. "I'm getting dinner. Sort your shit."

Noiz lowered his voice and spoke to Koujacku once more before heading down the way they were originally going. Clear tried not to listen but his hearing was far better than a human's and he couldn't help overhearing Noiz say. "I told you he's lying."

Noiz left them to it, with a small nod towards Clear as he walked past. Clear watched Koujacku warily, wondering what he was going to do.

Koujacku only sighed and leaned against the wall, rubbing his eyes with a thumb and forefinger.

"Noiz thinks you're lying about killing Aoba," Koujacku said. Clear blinked, confused at what he meant. He was grateful for the mask to cover his face. Koujaku snorted. "He thinks you're too innocent, too  _sorrowful_ to have done something like that." 

"Why would I lie about it?" Clear asked quietly.

"Hell if I know!" Koujacku shouted. He slumped against the wall again, looking even more exhausted than before. Everyone seemed to be sad and tired these days. 

"I don't want you to hate me Koujacku-san," Clear said without thinking. He hadn't meant to let it slip. He had never done that before, letting what he felt deep inside slip out of his mouth. He barely even though about his innermost feelings, well, thoughts, since he wasn't human and didn't have the capacity for feeling. They were something he tried to ignore, something that he wasn't entirely comfortable with acknowledging.

"I don't want to hate you either," Koujacku said tiredly. "I'm tired of hating people and being depressed." 

"I hate myself," Clearly muttered to himself. Another thing that he had hidden in the depths of his heart, hoping to avoid. But in the presence of someone who he knew had been close to Aoba it was hard to not show that he truly regretted what he did. He wanted  _someone_ to know that there was hope for him. That he wasn't a complete monster. He just didn't want to think this way anymore. It was too tiring, this punishment that he had created for himself. But when he thought of Aoba and all the happiness he wouldn't be able to feel, because of  _Clear_ , he was again thinking that maybe he did deserve this eternal exhaustion.

"I'll- I think it's time to move on," Koujacku said. He looked up at the ceiling and laughed mirthlessly. "I feel like such a dick, saying that so soon after learning about his death."

Clear didn't think he was at fault for moving along so quickly. He was sure there were months that they had all spent, sure that Clear and Aoba were dead. It seemed like it was something that they had accepted a long time ago. And they ended up being right about their deaths.

"I don't know what to think of you anymore," Koujacku continued, standing and heading to get dinner. "But I think I will move on, even though it's hard. Maybe you should too."

He left Clear again, sweeping past him, the bottom of his kimono flapping slightly as he hurried past Clear to catch up to Noiz. 

Clear wanted to take Koujacku's advice, he really did, but he wasn't sure he would ever be able to move on and forgive himself.

* * *

 

His small, dark room was always something of a comfort to Mink. When he wanted to be alone all he had to do was retreat inside and shut his door. Then he no longer had to hear the others or have to deal with their problems, because entering his room was something that intimidated all of them, he knew. It had its draw backs. Not many, but no one bothered to speak to him much and he was left with a heavy feeling in his chest that he had become accustomed to. He was lonely, he knew that.

He was lonely for a reason though. He didn't plan on living for very long. His tribe was the only thing that had kept him alive for so long. It kept him happy, but it was gone. Revenge was the only thing he had left and after that he would have nothing. So once Toue was dead, Mink would die with him and join his family. And because he knew he was going to die from his own hand soon, hopefully, he wouldn't want a person to become attached to him. The world didn't need anymore of the sadness that was already so bountiful. 

Mink didn't need, or want, someone to miss him. 

Being lonely was a small price he had to pay to finally rejoin his family.

He closed his book, unable to focus on the printed words stamped across the page anymore. He thought it was time for a walk, he needed to make a plan for what to do about Toue anyways. Perhaps he could talk to Clear about him and get some more information out of him as well.

Clear was a good tool. He might have even been better than Aoba would have been, had he gotten a hold of him. 

Mink placed his book back on top of the others and put his cuffs on, making sure they were secure on his wrist and neck. He then strode out of his room, shutting the door behind him.

His boots thumped against the worn ground, the sound bouncing off the walls and echoing down the hallway. It was a monotonous, steady sound, and it lulled Mink into a kind of stupor that made it easy for him to slip into his mind. 

He thought the best plan for getting to Toue was to have others down in the lower areas of the Tower as he took to finding Toue in the upper parts of the Tower, where he was sure to reside. It was an unsure plan though, something that could be easily altered depending on what information Clear would give up. 

Mink turned a corner deciding that he would speak to Clear some more about the matter. It would be best to know as much as he could.

Mink made his way to the room that Clear was assigned when he returned a couple days prior. He wasn't sure if he would actually find Clear there since he had a tendency to wander. 

As Mink rounded the final corner he ran right into Clear who was shuffling his way around, with his head down.

Clear made a surprised noise and backed up, raising his head to look at who he bumped into. "Ah, Mink-san, I'm sorry I wasn't paying attention."

Mink nods. "I was looking for you. I want to hear more about what happened in the Tower."

Clear shook his head. "I told you everything already, Mink-san."  

"Aren't there some things you left out that would help us with Toue?"

Clear hesitated. "He let me have a lot of freedom in the Tower to do what I wanted with Aoba as long as I didn't disturb any of his plans."

Mink considered this silently. It didn't seem that Toue kept as high a regard for Clear as he had originally thought. He was still valuable though, what Toue thought of Clear was vital. If he underestimated or thought highly of Clear, Mink could plan something using that trust or lack of faith to his advantage. It was only a matter of getting into the Tower after that.

Mink studied Clear, looking for something else that could help him along in getting an idea going.

"You told him you were looking for someone to take Aoba's place?" Mink asked.

Clear nodded. "He still thinks I'm like his other Alphas too."

Mink crossed his arms and looked towards the wall. It wasn't anything new. He would have to do some more digging.

"Does he think of you as cold-hearted, because you killed Aoba and immediatley started seeking his replacement?" Mink continued.

Clear giggled suddenly, bringing Mink's attention back to him. "Mink-san, you really do ask a lot of questions."

"I have to," Mink answered, raising an eyebrow at Clear's sudden turn in behavior. The playful tone he was using was the one constantly coming from him before he went to the Tower. But he hadn't spoken in that manner ever since then. It was strange, this sudden jump back.

"Is it because you like listening to people? Ah, but you're always so grumpy and cut off, I can't picture that!" Clear said. Mink scrunched his eyebrows together, thoroughly confused with Clear's behavior. "I like listening to people. Especially, when they sing and talk about jellyfish!" Clear spun around and walked down the hallway. "Well, I forgot to do something Mink-san, I'll see you later!"

Clear flounced away, leaving a confused Mink in his wake. Mink thought that Clear was certainly the only one who could throw him like he just did. He went from depressed-looking to jumpy and playful again in an instant.

Mink turned away, too occupied with the thought of Clear to worry about what he was going to do with Toue. 

 

 


	4. Behind Masks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been a while guys (and that the chapter is so short, ugh). Things have been shitty and I got really worried about the pacing of this thing since, to me, I've always moved things along too quickly but I got over that. Realized that I should probably have more fun with it and worry less. Let's see where this psychology is going to take us with this thing, shall we?  
> I'm going to update every Saturday now as well. And when I get more time- since these chapters are /a lot/ smaller than I'm used to- I'll start updating twice or maybe even three times a week. And I have a different username since the last one was garbage.

What Clear needed was for someone to ask if he was okay and someone to know he was lying when he said yes.

It was a hard thing, one that he was unsure would bear results, but he wanted it nonetheless. It was certainly getting tiring, sounding happy all the time, even if he didn't have to move his face too much behind the gas mask. After speaking to someone he felt like slumping over and falling asleep. It was a human fatigue that he was sure he wasn't supposed to have but he couldn't really bring himself to care anymore. It hardly mattered if he sunk into oblivion. No one would miss him.

Yet he still  _wanted_ someone to care, and he hated himself for it. He didn't think that he deserved having someone care. And this thought led him to a constant back and forth, fueled by his feeling that he wasn't human. He was never human to begin with, only a deluded robot who fell in love. 

Clear sighed and went outside. He was lying in his room, but thought it might do him good to step outside of Scratch headquarters. He hadn't been outside since he had come back from Toue's a second time, nearly a week ago. He mostly hid in his room and left himself to his thoughts which, at the moment, wasn't a healthy thing to do.

Clear slipped his gas mask on, having taken it off at some point and placed it over his face again. He walked out of his room and marched right to the exit of headquarters. He hardly passed any people along the way, and thankfully none of them were people he knew. It was just himself with the occasional ghost of a face that he saw around sometimes floating past him. There were also the dank walls and floors surrounding him that had become something of a comfort over the time that Clear had been there. They were there to shelter him when he had nothing else. And they didn't bear any reminders that he was alone because of himself. Everything else constantly reminded him of Aoba. It seemed he was unable to escape his face, because it was in every corner that he turned and every false shade of blue that he thought he saw out of the corner of his eye. It was as if an apparition had come to visit him and remind him of Aoba. 

Clear walked as quietly as he could through headquarters. He was not stopped once and he was almost able to reach the exit before he was finally found by someone.

"Oi, where the fuck do you think you're goin'?" a voice asked. Clear turned, addressing the scrawny man whom the voice belonged to.

He simply said. "Outside." 

He left the man, flustered behind him. He was sure the man would tell Mink of his leave but he just wanted to get outside. He strode through the hallways and past the rubble that shielded the entrance and into the dark night.

When Clear finally escaped the confines of the building he looked up immediately, as if some force were pulling his face towards the sky.

And above him hung the most stars he had ever seen in his life, threatening to fall and crush him. It was beautiful.

The stars were always barely visible because of the lights of Platinum Jail and even the Old Residents District outside, but now there were no lights, save for the ones from Oval Tower, and the stars were clearly bright and twinkling. They pulsed, as if ready to jump right on top of Clear, but he didn't retreat under the shield of his umbrella, not even when a wayward star shot across the sky, leaving a trail of light in its wake.

From what Clear could see the stars posed no threat to him at the moment. They were probably waiting for the right moment to spring on him and _finally_ kill him. Or maybe they wanted to torture him and leave him to his less-than existence forever.

That thought scared Clear. He did not want to stay, not if it meant he had to suffer through his loneliness, his guilt, his grief and his pain any longer. It was all too much and yet he couldn't bring himself to fall asleep forever either. It was not just the star's fault for him still being alive, it was his own. And he wasn't sure what to make of it. At this point, he had mostly forgotten about his promise to punish himself by living beyond Aoba. He thought that the promise was stupid and unreasonable. It did not bring Aoba back and it certainly wasn't doing Aoba any good either.

There was nothing left to tie Clear to where he was. So, why he was still walking, talking, _hoping_ for something better was unclear to him. To be honest, a lot of things were unclear to him and they sent him into a dizzying spiral of confusion. He wasn't sure what he wanted anymore.

He wanted Mink to be close to him, but at the same time he didn't because who would want to be with a broken robot like Clear? He also thought that he wanted to kiss Mink like he did with Aoba, in the rain all that time ago. But there was also Aoba, and Clear felt that there would be a betrayal to him if he began to love Mink like he loved Aoba. Or maybe he was simply afraid of moving on and leaving Aoba wondering where he had gone on that cliff.

Clear walked around the worn streets, never letting his eyes leave the sky. The way the stars seemed so unmovable fascinated him. They were strong, and not necessarily eternal but close. Clear wondered if he ever would become like that and leave the state that he was. He wanted to burn brightly like those stars and leave behind his form as an aimless, hunk of rock. He wanted to be strong.

Mink was not the only thing that made him unsure. His very existence, what he  _was_ was even more confusing than the man that he felt himself becoming inexplicably drawn to. He had spent a lot of time over the week, with nothing to do but think. And in that time he began to wonder about what Aoba had said to him about being the same, human. Aoba was not one to lie about things like that, especially when he knew they were important to Clear. So that left Clear confused, wondering if what he was and what he thought he was were two entirely different things. He was made of metal and programs but felt as if he was made of flesh and bones, as easily broken as any human. And that was the worst. If he could be human why couldn't he seem to experience joy and love as a human did. He hadn't felt joy since he kissed Aoba for the first time and felt that small spark of it. Even though it was raining the skies seemed as clear as the night above him and he saw the first glimpse of happiness. But it was gone, probably as soon as he and Aoba stepped into Platinum Jail.

Clear looked at a wall to the left of him and even that reminded him of Aoba. He remembered Aoba pressed up against the wall with Clear's fingertips ghosting over his cheek. And his lips were incredibly soft underneath his. He remembered the soft patter of rain against his umbrella and he remembered feeling  _human_. It was the best moment of his life, because he had found someone that he could kiss and finally take his mask off around.

Clear raised his hand and traced the mask with his gloved fingers. It was rough and didn't look human at all, but it was preferable to showing his real face. For a moment he wondered how different his real face would feel and removed the gas mask slowly. There was a window close to him but he couldn't bare looking in the dirty, cracked reflection that it offered. He could just feel his face and that would be enough for him. He placed the mask in his pocket, so both of his hands were free and felt it.

It was soft, fleshy much like Aoba's skin. He could feel two small bumps beneath his lip on the right side. His nose was small he supposed and his lips were soft, not too thin or plump and his eyebrows were thin things, hidden by his bangs. His eyelashes were fine and his eyes felt no different than the norm on Midorijima looked. He wondered what made him look inhuman. Was it his eye color? Or maybe his teeth. He traced a finger over them and they were smooth and perfectly lined in his mouth, with no animistic points save for his canines, but that was a characteristic every human had.  

"Gas Mask," a gruff voice said. It was Mink and Clear reacted to his voice without thinking. He turned to face him, somehow having forgotten that he should be wearing his gas mask. But he realized his mistake as soon as their eyes met and Mink raised both of his eyebrows in surprise. Clear hastily reached into his pocket and held his gas mask over his face while fumbling with the straps with one hand. 

"Mink-san?" Clear asked cheerfully. His fingers kept slipping and the buckles weren't cooperating. It was frustrating. All he wanted to do was hide his face and it was something he did everyday; but having Mink watch him in the act made his nerves spike and his composure crumble. 

"Don't bother," Mink said, addressing the gas mask. Then he continued. "Where were you going?"

"On a walk!" Clear said. He had stopped working the buckles but still held the mask over his face, too afraid to bring it down. 

Mink strode forward and grabbed his wrist, but he didn't tug Clear's hand and gas mask away from his face. "Why do you wear this?"

"My face-" Clear began and began backing away.

"It looks fine," Mink stated. He frowned and crossed his arms. "Get back to headquarters."

Clear blanched. He hadn't expected Mink to say something like that about his face. "I-I... you don't think my face is repulsive?"

Mink's eyebrows scrunched together. "No." 

Clear fell to his knees, hardly feeling the rough gravel through his baggy pants. He sat there on the ground like a child awaiting their teacher to begin their lesson. He let the gas mask fall from his hands and covered his face with his hands instead. He felt himself smile and then cry. He felt such a swirl of emotion in his chest, he wasn't sure what to do. Was he to laugh or cry or kiss Mink?  

"Oi," Mink said. He didn't kneel down or offer a comforting hand but, presuming Clear hadn't completely lost his ability to distinguish when someone cared for him or not, he thought he heard a little bit of concern in Mink's voice.

"I'm sorry, Mink-san," Clear said. He wiped at his eyes, still struggling with his inner turmoil. "I'm fine."

"You clearly are not," Mink stated. He gripped Clear's elbow and pulled him up to stand again. "Go back." 

And for the second time, Clear embraced Mink. Mink didn't reciprocate the action and Clear didn't expect him to. He only wanted the feeling of Mink's muscles through their clothing and the smell of cinnamon wafting into his nose, a steady force. 

Clear held on tightly to Mink for a couple of minutes and Mink made no move to push him away. He merely stood there passively and took Clear's embrace. 

Finally Clear let go and looked at Mink with eyes sparkling with tears. He was grateful to Mink and he felt happier than he had in a long time but Mink was right in saying that Clear was not alright. it would take more than Mink saying that Clear's face was fine once to get Clear's phobia over and make him feel okay again. But it was a start. A start that wasn't guaranteed to continue beyond that but a start nonetheless.

* * *

 

Mink had brought Clear back to headquarters with him. He stuck close by him and put his mask back on once they were close to headquarters again. Clear seemed reluctant to part ways but eventually left when Mink stated that he had to speak to some members of his team about the supplies that they had left.

After they parted ways Mink realized he forgot to glean more information off of Clear. But if they were running low on food again he would take Clear along and could question him then and they could work together to come up with something.

Mink strode to the supply room, where the food, medical supplies, blankets and other supplies that they might find themselves needing someday, were held.

Standing in front of the door was a man that Mink was familiar with. He had green hair and was a very loyal member. He had no problem doing what Mink said promptly and without question.

Mink nodded to him and the man got the silent cue immediately.

"We're good on pretty much everything, but we need more food and cleaning supplies."

Mink nodded and was about to walk away again when the man stopped him.

"Is there a chance that I can go on this run this time?"

Mink shook his head. "Watch over the place."

There was also Clear, whom Mink wanted alone when he spoke to him. He found that Clear was much more open when it was just the two of them. It would be a lot easier getting him to cooperate if it was just them and no one else. Although, Mink doubted that Koujacku would let them be. He had quite a tough time backing down when he felt responsible for something and this was something he would probably feel the need to take some responsibility for. And if Koujacku went then so would Noiz and maybe even Tae since she was practically Koujacku's grandmother at this point.

They wouldn't be too much of a hindrance he supposed, as long as Koujacku kept to himself there should be no problem. They could have separate quarters that Mink could say would help them with looking out for potential threats. He had done this before on other runs, even though they all knew it was futile since everyone was as good as dead, but with Toue still lurking around it was better to be prepared than caught off guard.

Mink walked to Clear's room, where he was sure to be found. He seemed to be very reclusive, which was not something that Mink expected from someone who was typically flamboyant when he spoke with people. However, after Mink had gotten to know him a little more, it did make sense. Especially after he had fallen to his knees and cried once Mink said that his face was not repulsive. Mink guessed that he wore the mask so he could slip under Toue's radar but he didn't see how that made him think his own face was repulsive.

Mink knocked on Clear's door and there was rustling on the other side.

"One second," Clear said cheerfully. Mink was beginning to understand that this happiness in Clear's voice was absolutely fake, much like Mink's leadership role that he had somehow been assigned. He was no leader, only someone who wanted to get revenge for his family.

The door opened and Clear's masked face peeked around the corner of his door. Once he caught his first glimpse of Mink he didn't hesitate to swing the door open. He dropped the cheerfulness in his voice and instead whispered his name in greeting.

"We're low on food and need to get some more," Mink said. "I want you to come with me."

Clear stood in silence for a moment. "Is anyone else going to come?"

"Red and Maniac most likely," Mink answered. Clear nodded and began to retreat back into his room when Mink stopped him one more time. "We're leaving tomorrow, early in the morning, be ready."

"Yes, okay," Clear said patiently before hiding completely behind his closed door. 

  

 


	5. Melancholic Beauty

As Mink had predicted, once word spread around that he was leaving, Koujacku immediately confronted him with a strong sense of moral duty that absolutely would not allow him to not participate in helping their group get food. Of course, Noiz stated that he would be coming as well because he didn't want "you old men to pop a hip."

And so Mink, Clear, Koujacku and Noiz were elected to go out into the Old Resident District and scrounge for food. It would be a quick mission. One day at the most. They would take a truck, break into houses, take the non-perishable foods and come back to Scratch. It was simple and they never needed more than a trunks worth of food since they were just shy of a dozen people and they didn't mind going out every other week for more food, because there was nothing else to do.

Haga set up the truck and prepared it to go out into town. The group that was heading out waited patiently in the main part of Scratch headquarters. Mink took concerns from some of his team members and some things that might be needed at a later date. It was business as usual. And there was an underlying anticipation that Mink was beginning to feel. He supposed he was getting tired of being in headquarters all the time. And Clear was coming, and there was now opportunity to get down to really making plans against Toue. 

Clear sat at the far end of the room, tucked away in a corner where no one would be bound to notice him. He was still wearing his gas mask.

Haga appeared in the doorway after an hour ad motioned for them to follow him. "It's all ready. You should be good to go now."

Koujacku thanked him before catching up to the rest of the group who had gone to the garage ahead of him.  

A beat down truck waited for their arrival, it's old engine grumbling and headlights dimly lighting the garage. Everyone piled in and Mink was tempted to just go on his motorcycle, where he would be alone. But he didn't and instead got into the driver's side of the truck and waited for everyone else.

Once everyone was settled Mink drove out into the world once again. It was nice being away from the confines of Scratch headquarters. He remembered times when he was outside constantly, learning from his mother how to make jewelry and dream-catchers for his tribe under the sun. He remembered running in the grass with his little sister and  _laughing,_ a deep laugh that shook his entire body. He remembered sitting in the same grass he had played in as a child and eating food under the trees with his fiancee. He remembered the dances he partook in under any sky because to his tribe, everyday was a day to dance and celebrate. He remembered being happy before he became trapped in a jail cell and later the basement of some decrepit building in a place where no one dared venture. He forgot how much he could miss the sun and the stars.

They rattled down the remnants of the streets in relative silence through the majority of the Northern District until Koujacku began to speak.

"We haven't been down here in a while," he said, a tinge of wistfulness coloring his voice. 

"No need to reminisce," Noiz muttered.

"Don't you miss your home?" Koujacku questioned. "Or the members in Ruff Rabbit?"

"Not particularly," Noiz answered, leaning his cheek into the palm of his hand.

"Tch, brat," Koujacku murmured.

Noiz huffed and gazed out the dirt speckled window of the truck. "Do you miss your hoard of girls?"

Koujacku crossed his arms. "Some of them were nice and all, but no I don't really miss them."

Noiz seemed pleased with the answer and visibly relaxed. Mink thought that Noiz was acting a bit like his fiancee did a while ago, whenever she got jealous over women who would show interest in him.

Mink forced himself to focus on the road again. He didn't want to think about it in front of everyone. He could do so when he was alone, but in front of others was not an appropriate time. 

"Clear," Koujacku began slowly. They were both still tentative around each other, Mink supposed, since it was revealed that Clear had killed Aoba. "Do you miss anything?"

Clear tensed. "No. Everyone I was close to is dead." When his statement was met with a somber and uncomfortable silence he laughed. "It's alright though. I can live just fine on my own."

The sad attempt at deflecting only makes things worse and Koujacku sat back in his seat, from where he had been leaning forward to speak with Clear. 

Noiz is finally the one to break the tension when they leave the Northern District. "Wonder what the rest of the world is like right now."

"It probably isn't as damn broken as it is here," Koujacku responded. 

Noiz snorted. "Maybe I'll move to Germany after this shit-storm blows over."

"Why so far?" Koujacku asked while simultaneously trying, and failing, to feign nonchalance.   

Noiz shrugged. "I know people there. The bonus is that Toue hasn't rubbed his grimy hands all over that place, last time I checked."

Koujacku crossed his arms. "I probably would have taken Aoba somewhere before."

Mink didn't have to look over to know that Clear had tensed and was probably fighting back tears behind that mask of his. Mink, for the first time in a long time, felt a little inclined to reach out and comfort Clear somehow. He just looked so vulnerable with his heart so obviously sheared in two. It reminded him of himself. 

"As a friend?" Noiz prompted. Koujacku offered no words of any kind and the back seat quickly grew silent, the air staticky with an unspoken but obvious issue between the two.

Koujacku finally ceased talking altogether after this and the rest of the drive was spent in silence. Mink would have been grateful for it, if not for the callous air that accompanied it. Maybe he wouldn't have minded the chatter between Koujacku and Noiz. It was something to distract from invasive thoughts of his family. They were painful and it was hard for him to pretend he was the apathetic man that he made himself out to be. It kept him distant from everyone else.

But, the truth was he wasn't distant because he was apathetic. He had emotions and hurt just like Aoba and Koujacku and Noiz and the members of Scratch and Clear. The difference was that he didn't show it. To protect himself and others it was best that he didn't. He couldn't leave someone the way his family had left him, made worse by the fact that he would leave them because of his own hand. 

Mink missed his family. So much so that he was willing to cut ties with the living to join the dead. He would blot out the rest of the Earth for his tribe. 

It wasn't apathy that made him distant. It was love.

* * *

 

Their arrival at the Eastern District was met with no nonsense. They immediately got to work with gathering supplies. Noiz and Koujacku would break windows with rocks and Mink would pick locks so they could enter stores and homes to get the things they needed.

Clear was the quickest among their little group with gathering things. 

It was a monotonous job, gathering things and then loading them into the truck until they were satisfied with their findings in the store or house. Clear would hum things quietly to himself all the while. From what Mink could hear, they were somber songs, that reminded him of sadness and longing. They were songs that a young girl would sing after they had broken up with their first love; or songs that an elderly person would sing after they said goodbye to their last. They were songs that would remind a person that everyone dies and moves on and that nothing is permanent. They were songs that peeled away the happiness and revealed the harsh realities of life in all of its forms.

But towards the end of the day, when they began to become tired with all of the walking from store to truck and back and hauling pounds of cans, Clear's songs changed. They didn't become happy by any means. But their properties were made up of a melancholic beauty that reminded him of the vast _loneliness_ of space and the multicolored galaxies that danced and swirled there. It reminded him that while the cosmos were filled with darkness, there was still light tucked away in its recesses, waiting to be found by a wandering eye observing the night sky.

When the sun began to set and the sky reminded Mink of the pink of Clear's eyes they decided to retire to Tae's house.

Koujacku gazed longingly down one road and ran his fingers through his hair, obviously lost in memories. But he didn't say anything as he turned his back towards the place he had seemed to want to go to, nor did he look back as they drove further away.

Tae's house was not far from the last store they had visited so they arrived in no time at all.

Everyone tiredly and slowly moved out of the truck and to the front door. Mink took out a key that Tae had given him after sadly reminding him to lock the door after himself.

Once they entered Mink immediately went to locate a bedroom that he could use. He was tired and would like to attempt to sleep. Although, it was usually something that evaded him even in one of his exhausted states.

He entered Tae's room, familiar with it already. It wasn't uncommon for them to use her home on runs like this when they were too tired to come back in a day and his time spent here waiting for Toue to finish his mind-washing had given him enough time to memorize the house.

Koujacku went upstairs, presumably to Aoba's room and Noiz hesitated on the stairs.

Mink didn't know where Clear went and he was nearly curious enough to look for him. But instead he pushed Clear's whereabouts to the back of his mind and prepared for sleep.

* * *

On their arrival at Tae's house Clear made a beeline to the roof. He had a feeling he would be comfortable there and he would be able to see the stars again and _maybe_ they would finally decide to rain down on him. 

Once Clear was settled he remembered his first visit in Aoba's room. He had come down from the roof, to make Aoba laugh. He thought being quirky like that was something that would be funny to Aoba and he wanted nothing more than to hear his master laugh. Of course, things didn't work out that way, they never did. But there were still many opportunities that he used to make Aoba laugh and to deflect his feelings of not belonging.

He missed Aoba. He missed his laugh. His voice. He missed _everything_ that came with Aoba, including his feelings of being a human, even though he was far from deserving of it. 

Clear curled in on himself. He brought his knees up until they were tucked under his chin and wrapped his arms around his knees.

He took his mask off and set it down beside him. When he tilted his head up to look at the stars he had an unobstructed view of the sky. There were no stars out just yet, as the sun was still making its slow descent in the sky. But the moon was faintly etched into the sky, a whisper of its intensity when it was dark.

Clear sighed and waited to be shrouded in night with his eyes closed and his ears listening to the quiet world around him.

The most he could hear was the rustle of movement below him, in Aoba's room. Silence. And then more movement as another person entered the room.

"I thought you were angry with me," Koujacku said. 

"You were in love with Aoba," Noiz stated. "Are you still?"

Clear winced in sympathy. Because he knew that in the lives they were living, it was a painful thing to be in love with Aoba Seragaki. 

Koujacku sighed. "I don't know."

"Yeah, well, I don't want an old man who's still hung up in the past to be fucking me," Noiz retorted. Clear wondered if he should stop eavesdropping. It was getting too personal for his comfort. But he also wanted to know if someone else was in love with Aoba. It wasn't out of jealousy though. He wanted to know so he wouldn't feel so alone in his pain. 

"Damn it, Noiz!" Koujacku exclaimed. "Just _try_ and understand for once. I've loved him for a long time. And I'm going to be selfish enough to ask for your sympathy."

"Why should I give you sympathy?"

"Because I fucking thought we cared for each other!"

There was silence for a very long time. It dragged along and Clear almost wished he could see their faces so he didn't have to wait and hear what would happen. He wanted them to sort through it. They deserved some happiness, especially Koujacku whom had the man he loved ripped away from him.

"I don't know how to do that," Noiz finally said quietly. "I don't know... emotions and feelings."

"I'll teach you about them," Koujacku said. "And you can teach me how to move on, completely."

Clear thought that they had lapsed back into a tense silence but after a time the smack of lips and hushed moans reached his ears.

As soon as he realized what they were up to he tried moving his attention away from the two of them. There was nowhere else he could direct his hearing to except for the faint ringing that was always faintly present in his ears. He decided to focus on that, feeling that he'd rather not deal with the alternative. Although, it got difficult to block out when they begin to get even  _louder_. 

Clear sighed and buried his face into his knees. His treacherous mind brought forth an image of what it was like with Aoba. He remembered his fragile body bouncing on top of him. He remembered his satisfaction with seeing Aoba so  _weak_ and pliable for him. His carnal pleasure seemed to reign over his concern for Aoba and it sickened him to think about it. He was disgusting for wanting something like that from Aoba when he was starving, dying and so  _afraid._  

He heard the front door of the house open and heavy footsteps trod across the ground.

Clear stood and walked across the roof quietly, before looking down to see Mink at the base, smoking and grumbling to himself. He was without his coat and his tight black shirt was the only thing clinging to his torso.

Clear dropped to the ground and without turning Mink said, "They're loud."

"Yes," Clear agreed. He held his gas mask, poised in the air wondering if he should put it on. "You don't mind me without my mask?"

"No," Mink answered. Clear exhaled and shakily put it into the pocket of his coat as he moved forward. 

Mink blew out some more smoke in his next exhalation, letting it curl into the air in front of him before it dissipated into the night air. 

Clear watched him and observed his straight back and his prominent cheekbones. He was beautiful and regal in a way that made Clear want to reach out and touch him as if he was a piece of artwork, waiting to be felt and cherished. His form was only accentuated by the night dappled with the sparse amount of stars that were out in the early evening. He was tall and his frame was wide and fit with muscle. Clear again wanted to reach out and touch and marvel. And he probably would have if Mink didn't turn to him and cut off his thoughts with the sudden movement. 

"We need to talk about Toue," Mink said. Clear nodded and turned his gaze away, trying to hide the sudden annoyance that shot through his body and caused him to cross his arms. He tried not to feel hurt over the fact that Mink was probably only thinking about how to kill Toue instead of thinking how wonderful the night sky was. Or what it would be like if they kissed each other underneath it. Clear told himself it shouldn't matter because he wasn't supposed to think of those things either because of his devotion to Aoba. But Koujacku's words about moving on flashed through his mind and he wondered if someday those thoughts about kissing Mink would be alright.

"What about him?" Clear asked.

"How do we get into Oval Tower so we can kill him?" Mink asked.

Clear sighed and dropped his arms to his sides again. He thought about it, muttering his thought process out loud. "I told him I was going to go out and find someone to experiment on. At most, two people. Maybe we could use that somehow. I'm not sure how though."

"Use me," Mink said suddenly. Clear snapped his eyes back to meet Mink's. "I could be your new 'experiment.'"

Clear nodded, the plan formulating in his mind. "Yes. We could just walk through the front doors if that were so. And there are a lot of side entrances into the Tower. So if you wanted to bring others they could sneak in through there while Toue is dealing with me. Ah, but they have to be careful of my siblings."

"Siblings?" Mink questioned.

"Other robots. They're newer models but we're all basically the same," Clear explained.

Mink shook his head. "You're different." 

Clear's eyes widened and he looked across the street, at his feet, and back towards the house, anywhere but Mink. 

"We'll talk about it in more detail when we're with the others," Mink said. He was about to turn away when he stopped and addressed Clear once again. "Why do you wear the gas mask?"

Clear could detect the barely concealed curiosity and quickly stuffed down the spark of hope that ignited in his chest and came with the thought of Mink being curious about him. It was an easy thing to do, as Clear remembered the reason he was supposed to be hidden away from the world, tucked away and alone.

"Because I'm a monster, Mink-san," Clear chirped, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"You look human," Mink stated.

"So does Toue, Mink-san. My looks mean nothing," Clear said and retreated back behind his mask before he went up to the roof again.  

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gosh, the first time I set a schedule for this fic and I'm already late a day (well technically two but only by an hour here [and if I said it was just in time because it's the third anniversary of dmmd now would you feel like hitting me?]). I'm really sorry, I had a hard time writing this out with projects before spring break and then dealing with Mink being a fucking pain in the ass to write.


	6. Sing A Song

Packing up from their trip was easy. They had brought nothing with them but the clothing on their backs and the truck. So once everyone was up it was time to leave.

They all piled into the cab of the truck. Their seating arrangement was the same as they had when they arrived. Koujacku and Noiz were in the back, albeit a little closer to each other. While Mink and Clear were seated at the front.

Clear was still wearing his gas mask.

The drive back was not as silent or awkward as their first drive together. Noiz and Koujacku spoke to each other often. They went from poking fun at each other to soft murmurs that hardly traveled to the front seat.

Clear didn’t breathe a word the entire time. He stayed curled against the window. Mink couldn’t tell if he was sleeping or gazing out of the window, yearning for another time and place.

* * *

 

Their arrival was met with a flurry of activity as everyone took part in gathering the food and other supplies that they had gathered over their stay.

It didn't take long at all for their spoils to be packed away in storage.

Mink had known that Clear had helped as well. He had caught glimpses of him over the small crowd of people, weighed down by cans and other items. But as soon as everything was neatly packed away Mink could not find Clear anywhere amongst the crowd.

Mink returned to his room, with Tori perched on his shoulder. 

“Are you growing fond of him?” Tori asked once Mink shut them away in his room.

“What?” he groused. Tori flew onto the shelf that he liked to rest on. He dug his claws into the wood, as a real bird might and settled down. Mink lit his pipe and took a drag. He didn't particularly like smoking but the pipe had come from his tribe, one of the last tangible pieces of their existence and he didn't want to leave it as just a sad decoration, a reminder of what once was. It was better to use it for its intended purpose. There was no use for something that didn't have a purpose.

“Clear. I heard you two last night. And your eyes seem to find him wherever he is,” Tori continued. “Are you fond of him?”

Mink sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I don’t know.”

Tori cocked his head. “You seem upset.”

“It is not something that is convenient to my situation,” Mink murmured.

“But you are not emotionless,” Tori reasoned. “It is not something that can be helped.”

Mink grunted. “Yes.”

Tori shook out his feathers and made as if he was going to sleep. “You humans. Don’t you know suppressing your emotions will change nothing?”

“Go to sleep, Tori.”

Tori did as he was ordered and left Mink to think in silence.

Being fond of Clear was not something he had thought of before. Being with Clear was something that just... was. Mink had originally thought of him as a tool. But now that he thought of it, a thought like that hadn't intruded into his picture of Clear in a while. He couldn't even remember when he last thought of Clear as just a tool.

Mink sighed and untied his hair, letting it tumble over his shoulders and down his back.

He would rest for a little while before calling the meeting that would _finally_ plan Toue’s demise.

* * *

 

Mink only gathered those that would be of use in the fight against Toue, but there’s was a small community and everyone soon knew about it.

By the time Mink arrived for the meeting that evening, everyone was gathered in the room that was once used for punishing those who rebelled.

The older people, like Tae and Haga and Yoshie were sitting on the worn couch and bed. The younger members were sitting in parts of the floor, covering the spray-painted symbol of Scratch with their bodies. The rest were standing around the room, some casually leaning against the wall, others anxiously waiting Mink’s arrival with pacing.

The loyal, green haired man, Gurin, was amongst those pacing the room. When Mink arrived he strode over to him.

“Are we really going to go after Toue now?” he asked. Mink nodded and moved into the room and was greeted with the eyes of everyone waiting there.

Clear was standing in the corner of the room, much like he was when they were about to head out on their supply run. He was again wearing his mask, but even through that Mink could tell that he was lost in thought. Mink wondered if he was thinking about the time he had spent with Toue. Maybe he was trying to stay strong now that he was surrounded by everyone.

He only ever showed his true face when he was around Mink.

“There’s a way to get into the Tower,” Mink began. He glanced to Clear, silently telling him to stand beside him.

Clear moved tiredly through everyone until he was standing side by side with Mink. Without any prompting on Mink’s part Clear began to tell everyone of their discussion of Toue.

Once Clear’s part was done, an eruption of everyone’s voices blasted through the heavy silence that had taken hold of them when Clear was speaking.

At the raise of one of Mink’s hands they all silenced themselves.

“But that’s dangerous, what are we supposed to do if you get killed?” Gurin objected.

“Take over Scratch or leave it,” Mink stated. “You’re not children.”

“This isn't even a steady plan,” Koujacku interjected. “You’re going to stride into the _front doors_ and expect nothing to happen?”

“Quiet!” Tae shouted. To Mink’s amusement, everyone settled down quicker with her than they did with even him. “Toue at this point has taken over an entire island, molded Clear to his liking and successfully created multiple ways to wash a person’s mind. He was always cocky in my opinion, that might be even more apparent now. Having Clear retaliate might be a surprise to him. It would be best to come up with something about what to do with him once you reach him but I think it’s a safe gamble to go into the Tower like you've planned.”

Mink noticed Clear stiffen slightly at Tae’s mention of him being molded to Toue’s liking. He wondered if that was where Clear began to think that he had lost his worth. When he was influenced by such a despicable person as Toue. Mink didn't think he was at fault. Toue was, if anything, cunning. It would be easy to fall under his control if he was able to spring something on them that they didn't anticipate.

It was how his tribe had been wiped out after all. If such strong people were able to fall because of Toue, a lone person could not be blamed for being broken by him.

“We’ll need back-up,” Clear said. “Toue has others like me, who watch over the tower and Allmates that he uses as weapons.”

“I’m going,” Koujacku said before Clear even finished his sentence.

“I’ll go too,” Noiz volunteered. Koujacku looked at him with worry but didn't say anything to deter him of his decision.

Gurin and another man with blonde hair and blue eyes, who was always seen by Gurin’s side, were the next ones to volunteer.

Of course, every Scratch member took it upon themselves to insist on coming. Then, Mink worried about how all of them were to sneak in if they were needed. Surely, Toue would be suspicious of a group of people who were found following Clear and Mink into the Tower.

“We’ll figure out a way to get in ourselves, boss,” Gurin said.

Mink nodded and left, more than sure that they would be capable of planning this for themselves. He trusted them when it came down to it.

* * *

 

Mink left promptly after the Scratch members assured him that they would come up with something themselves. Clear followed him closely, he wanted to speak to Mink but he didn't have anything in mind about what they could speak about.

It was a yearning that he couldn't quite place and one that he didn't know what to do with.

“Mink-san,” Clear began quietly.

Mink stopped walking and turned to Clear, with an eyebrow raised, awaiting Clear to speak.

But Clear didn't know what he was going to say. There was a lot he wanted to say and it all congregated into a puff of air leaving his lips. There was too much to be said, and Clear didn't think he completely had it all sorted, nor did he believe that he was deserving of most of it.

“Come get me later,” Mink said. “Rest.”

“I don’t need rest,” Clear reminded him.

“You look like it,” Mink said. “Try anyway, we’re going to be leaving soon, hopefully.”

Clear nodded and let Mink leave.

He decided that he was going to go outside. It was where he did his best thinking, under the stars. It’s where he best liked to sing as well, and he hadn't sung in such a long time.

Maybe he would sing for Aoba under the stars, like he used to. He would sing for his grandpa and for Mink too.

So Clear clambered out of headquarters, telling the man who was looking over the entrance that he was going to step out for a little while.

When he breathed his breath puffed out in front of him, like the smoke from Mink’s pipe.

Clear didn't go far from Scratch, he didn't even make it beyond the rough edge of the building before he froze and turned his gaze up to the stars.

It wasn't a clear night as it had been during his first venture to look at the stars. Lazy, thin clouds rolled over the sky and blotted out some of their light. But even through that they still burned brightly enough to be seen, even if their intensity wasn't as concentrated.

Clear sighed and nearly sunk down to sit, like he would have if he had been standing on a rooftop.

But he stood his ground as he looked at the stars and their threatening glow.

He wondered if they would someday be the thing that killed the Earth. Not Toue or a disease or a thousand other things that people had dreamed up over the years, but the stars that they would look at and admire and make shapes of warriors and animals with.

Maybe the stars represented themselves and all of their burning intensity. Maybe when the stars clashed together so would everyone on Earth, and begin the harmonic destruction of the universe.

Would he live to see it? Or would he break under his own pain before he could catch a glimpse of the demise of the human race.

He didn't think he would want to see it.

He had grown with them. Spoken with them. Fallen in love with them.

Clear studied the stars and their scant patterns through the sky and thought that he might have seen the outline of a jellyfish in the pinpricks of light.

He closed his eyes though and forgot about the stars for a moment as he remembered what his original intent had been.

He would sing one more time out here, before they left for Oval Tower.

It just might be the last time he could sing the Jellyfish Song for his grandfather and Aoba. And Mink.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, all while imagining the sounds of a lullaby playing. One that only he and the ones he were singing for could hear. It was supposed to be a private moment that he could use to tell everyone how much he loved them, the different kinds of love he felt for each one of them. It was odd, doing this with nothing but a song that he had made up a long time ago because his grandfather liked speaking of jellyfish.

But it was a song that held a lot of meaning for him and he felt it was the best way for him to say what he was feeling inside with the feeling of his tongue and lips and voice working together to create a soft melody that his sadness had prevented him from singing for a while.

As his voice rung out into the night, bouncing off the hollow buildings that surrounded him he pretended that there was a symphony behind him. A symphony that complimented his voice and the quiet, near fragile way that he sung. He pretended that seated in front of him were the ones that he meant to sing to.

But it was not only Aoba and his grandfather. There was also Koujacku, reminding him of their tentative relationship that Clear cherished nonetheless. And there was Noiz and Tae also, as Clear felt a bond with them because of his ties with Aoba and their struggle against Toue.

Clear was beginning to understand that he knew a lot of people, much more than he had originally thought. They were there for him, adding to his light with their own.

Maybe he wasn't a piece of debris floating around aimlessly. Or maybe he was but his trajectory wasn't aimless. It was being pulled by gravity towards something bigger. And a while ago Clear would have thought that it would have been dragged towards a black hole. And maybe it still was, but before a multicolored galaxy, swirling with life could form, a black hole had to take its place in its center.

As Clear sang he felt that the black hole was there, a reminder of his loneliness and his guilt and his strong love for a man that he killed. It would always be there. But it was the foundation of something greater, beautiful even.

He just had to find the debris, the stardust to make it a galaxy. And make it burn as brightly as any star out there in the sky.

But when Clear opened his eyes and took in his bleak, gray world once again he remembered that galaxies took millions, if not billions of years to form.

And he was still healing. It would take a long time for him to heal completely, if he ever did.

Maybe people didn't heal completely from suddenly having a loved one taken from them. But they could come close, to a point where it was okay again, where they could say that solar systems and stars were forming in their galaxy and the black hole was not a threat but a steady source of gravity.

Clear would just have to wait for that day to come.

“Where did you learn that?” Mink asked. Clear turned and wondered how such a large man with such clunky combat boots could move so quietly when he wanted to.

“I made it,” Clear said and turned his gaze up again. “For my grandfather. He liked jellyfish. He talked about them often.”

Mink followed Clear’s gaze to the stars and Clear wondered if Mink was also waiting for the day that his galaxy would form completely.

“I was scared of stars,” Clear found himself saying. “I used to be scared of them crushing me. Then I thought that dying wouldn't be so bad and that fear kind of left me.”

“And now?” Mink asked.

“I don’t know,” Clear said. “I don’t know if I’m still waiting for them to kill me or something else. Maybe I’m waiting for them to lead me into a life where I don’t have to wish for them to crush me.”

“Is that why you were singing?”

“No. I-I was singing for everyone that I love. Just in case this is my last chance.”

“We’re leaving in a couple days, at least.”

“Okay. I guess I could sing for you again tomorrow as well.”

“Me?”

“Yes.”

Clear never made eye contact with Mink in his suggested love confession. He felt he didn't need to, not when he was removing his mask as he said it.

Even though Mink had not known him for long Clear was confident that he knew the mask protected him not only from Toue’s eyes but from the eyes of everyone who might think he was inhuman. It was his shield and removing it was exposing his chest, his heart.

“Mink-san,” Clear said quietly. He believed that after exposing his face again, his armor gone, he had found what he wanted to talk to Mink about. “Do you think I am human?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because you are kinder and more worthy of living than someone like me.”

“Is that really all that makes someone human? Kindness?”

Mink said nothing. He only puffed out more smoke and turned his blue eyes heavenward.

“I think being human means feeling things,” Clear said. “I think it’s feeling happiness and sometimes feeling it with others. I think it’s connecting with others and creating bonds with them and making memories. And I also think it’s laughing and crying and not just existing but _living_ and I think just _wanting_ to live is enough as well _._ ”

“Then doesn't that make _you_ human?”

“But-” Clear began, but he couldn't think of an instance where none of the above didn't apply to him. He felt things, love for his grandpa and Aoba and happiness when he was around them. He also felt sadness, a lot lately. He had created memories with everyone he had come into contact with, no matter how small, how trivial, they all mattered to him. He was beginning to realize that there were other outside of Aoba, as much as he loved him. And there was never an instance when he didn't feel a want to _live_ and _feel._

“Are you trying to convince yourself you’re less than human?”

Clear offered nothing but silence for a while. He thought of all the times when he squandered his love for Aoba to convince himself he was unworthy. Their time in the Tower is the time he used most heavily to tell himself that he was not human but... could there be a chance that he wasn't actually himself then? He hardly remembered that time, it passed as a hazy dream in his mind and it was after he had broken himself, when Toue had gotten his hands on him. He was not acting as himself. So... would it be bad of him to say that those things that happened were not his fault? No. Rather, they were things that were beyond his control.

But if he hadn't been so _weak,_ none of it would have happened.

Clear fisted one of his hands in his hair and shook his head. “I-I don’t know.”

“You’re human, Clear.”

Clear started at the use of his name. He didn’t think he had ever heard Mink utter his name before, but the sound of it coming from his lips was amazing. It blew away the clouds floating above them and it made Clear intensely sure that he would like to hear his name come from those lips a million times over. Maybe then it still wouldn't be enough.

“Mink-san, come to my room with me,” Clear said.

What he wanted to do was something he had only ever done with Aoba, only ever wanted to do with Aoba. But Mink... Clear loved him.

He had acknowledged it a while ago, it felt. It was a passing thought, like his boots and coat were white and the sky at night was dark and covered with stars. But as Mink had told Clear he was human, along with his name he felt that love for Mink with a burning clarity deep in his bones and shooting its way through his veins.

It drove his steps to hurry through the dim hallways. He didn't turn to make sure Mink was behind him because his long stride easily kept up with Clear. Besides, Clear was sure if he looked behind him he would not be able to wait any longer.

As soon as they entered Clear’s room, he crowded Mink against the closed door.

“I want you, Mink-san,” Clear practically growled.

Mink looked down at him in mild surprise before saying, “Undress and prep yourself then.”

Clear stepped back. He didn’t quite know what he was expecting but it certainly wasn't that. But he obeyed, noting the small wisp of something flicking across Mink’s face. It wasn't lust or love or anything of the sort, it was more something that made Clear wonder.

“We don’t have to do this, Mink-san,” Clear said, stopping his fingers from fumbling with the buttons of his shirt anymore. 

Mink nodded. “I would rather not.”

Clear felt a rush of embarrassment and retrieved his lab coat from the ground before shrugging it back on. He looked down at the ground.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered.

Mink sighed. “Don’t be.”

Clear chanced a glance into his face but was met with a daunting wall that guarded his face, his emotions from being viewed.

Mink left the room, but not before brushing a stray lock of hair out of Clear’s face.

                   

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the rough start and for naming the green-haired guy "green" in Japanese.  
> 


	7. Promises

The next morning, after their night under the stars, Clear began to act awkwardly around Mink.

Mink could understand why. He had not missed the quiet, near nonchalant way he had confessed to Mink. But it was a confession no matter its delivery.

However, Mink guessed the beginning of Clear’s uneasiness began not from his confession but from being denied sex. He had seemed so needy, and not in a pathetic way, but in a way that revealed his yearning for feeling whole again. Mink knew his declarations of Clear looking human had likely spurred Clear’s feelings for him.

Mink was beginning to think that this was his fault. Instead of trying to push Clear away with a half-assed attempt at humiliation he should have said no in the first place. In all actuality, pushing Clear away should have begun far before that; before he had snuck his way into Mink’s thoughts. It disturbed him, how someone whom he had barely known had managed to unknowingly infiltrate his barriers.

Clear had managed to do something that no one had been able to do for a very long time.

He had grown close to Mink. And maybe with a little more time he could do even more. And that was a dangerous thing for both of them. So Mink would sacrifice this good feeling, one that was so old he wasn’t sure it was familiar anymore, in exchange for Clear’s heart’s safety.

It was for the best if Clear thought that Mink would not want to speak to him again after last night. Clear was already made of fragile glass it would only take a little push to have him forget about ever liking Mink in any way.

There was only one day left to break Clear of his feelings for Mink.

Mink could leave Clear, he felt. He would die and wouldn’t have to worry of lingering feelings. But Clear would have to live the rest of his life knowing that yet another person he had come to care for had died.

Mink was sure that he would make it easier for Clear.

* * *

 

That day passed without anything noticeable occurring. The hallways were filled with the soft murmurs of others being carried down its tiled walls and floors, offering their words that were tinged with the false confidence that everyone seemed to have about the mission.

The truth was, none of them knew that it was going to go well; their plan was too loose for that. Not even Mink knew for sure if he was confident of how well their plan was going to go through.

There were many factors to worry about, cameras being the first and foremost of the problems. He would have to speak to Noiz about it sometime before Clear undoubtedly whisked him away again, back underneath the stars.

Mink decided that at the moment, before the sun set itself completely that it was best to speak to Noiz. He only hoped that it was not an appropriate time of the night for him and Koujacku to have already retired.

The nature of their relationship was painfully obvious as it seemed that the two of them couldn’t keep away from each other for more than a moment. Koujacku tended to reach out to Noiz and brush tiny touches across his skin or his clothes. But Noiz never seemed to want to return the attention, that or he was just generally very oblivious to the hand trailing feather-light touches down his arm or back or hand.

They were not the only relationship in Scratch of course. There were others whom thought they could get away with their subtlety. Some of them were quite good, having grown up with stolen items hidden in their clothing that later in their lives turned to drugs and surreptitiously looking for those who would stop them and get them in trouble. They were practiced criminals, used to hiding and shrouding themselves from view. But Mink saw it all as they were right in front of him every day. It was hard for him not to observe, not to accidentally slip into their daily lives and understand them more through their obvious twitches and habits.

Clear was one that was harder to crack. His movements were not one that Mink had witnessed on anyone else. He had never seen someone hide their pain and suffering behind two masks; a physical one and one made of laughter and cheerful chatter. Even after having heard most of what had twisted Clear over the past half-year that he was gone, Mink was still lost to some of the things that he thought. He was obviously one for deeper level thinking. But even a fundamental part of him like that was hidden from Mink, so much so that he could not pick up on it until Clear had asked him what it meant to be human.

Mink really did mean it when he said that Clear was human. Clear was a good person with a good heart, there was no doubt, even if his insides were not made of flesh and blood. Mink thought that mattered little in what Clear had asked him. For there were obviously people in the world made of flesh and blood that were not human in the least. They were the ones who could burn down tribes and kill or damage another without sparing a thought. They were not human. But Clear had never done anything so horrendous or despicable, nor would he ever think of doing anything like it. That in and of itself was enough to make him human: the fact that he cared.

Mink found himself in front of Noiz’s room, the dark and worn down door greeting his knuckles with loud _thuds_.

There was stumbling on the other side and more than a few muttered curses before the door was swung open to reveal a disheveled but otherwise casual looking Noiz. Mink’s eyes shifted into his room where he spotted Koujacku putting himself back into order.

“What did you come up with?” Mink asked, turning his eyes back to Noiz.

“It took a while but we came up with a plan. It’s a shit plan but it’s something,” Noiz stated.

“Most everyone just agreed that we were going to sneak into the Tower if you need any assistance with Toue or those Allmates and robots that Clear mentioned,” Koujacku explained further.

Mink nodded. It was as solid as they were going to get in their short planning time. Maybe he would tell them to hang back, outside of Platinum Jail for a while so it would give Clear and him a chance to make it into the Tower without any added worries.

Of course, Mink wouldn’t begrudge them if they barged in without his signal. This was also their fight. He had not missed his team’s despairing looks when he returned during that first week. They had all lost someone when Toue had taken over Midorijima. They could fight, as long as none of them took on Toue and none of them insisted on following him around.

Mink turned to Noiz again, “Deactivate any security cameras that might see you when you come in.”

Noiz nodded. “Got it.”

He closed the door as Mink turned away to leave again.

Now he was free and Clear was sure to come and find him soon. Mink headed to his room. He decided he was going to read before Clear would come to get him.

When Mink arrived in his room he moved Tori from the top of his books onto a bare space of shelving and picked up the novel on the top of the small pile.

He set himself comfortably on his bed and opened it. It was something he had read many times before. The character in it reminded him greatly of his sister, albeit fairly older and containing more cynicism. She was strong and beautiful like his sister. It was likely that they themselves could have been siblings with Nizhoni just as well as Mink.

Before long Mink was settled and gliding through the world inked in front of him on the pages. He loved reading. It was a chance for escape, one that brought him elsewhere for a time, places where he didn’t have to worry about killing someone and pushing people away. But sometimes, especially with this book, he became homesick. A character would say or think something that would remind him of a member of his family and he would feel a deep ache in his chest where his affections for his tribe once lay. It was a price to pay for his small moments of comfort.

Mink continued reading, letting himself be comforted as much as possible by the black words in front of him and the feeling of the pages between his fingers. He didn’t let the ache in his chest distract him from reading much with the thought that he would meet his tribe again soon. He could push the ache away easily with that alone.

There was a soft, tentative knock on his door that finally broke him away from his book.

Mink got up from his bed and put his book away before opening the door.

On the other side of the door was Clear.

The residing aches in Mink’s chest disappeared.

“Mink-san,” Clear began slowly, quietly. “I’m sorry.”

“What for?” Mink asked. It was gentler than he had meant it to be. To a stranger, the shift in his tone would have been unnoticeable but his open body language was still obvious enough to hint at what he may have been feeling for Clear.

Mink thought it was odd that someone that he thought so unlike himself could force his way into his heart and thoughts so gently and quietly.

“For last night,” Clear managed to say eventually. “I shouldn’t have done something like that.”

Mink stepped forward into the hallway and shut the door to his room behind him.

“Would you still like to sing for me?” Mink asked.

Clear looked away from his shoes and met Mink’s eyes. Or Mink assumed he did. His face was still hidden behind his mask as it was every other day.

“Yes,” Clear whispered.

Mink turned to go outside, he knew that Clear would go with him.

They walked together in silence, save for their matched footsteps clunking on the ground.

The outside met them with crisp air and another cloudless night. Mink felt more than saw Clear’s eyes on him as he looked up at the stars burning over their heads. He wondered what Clear thought the stars held. He wondered if Clear thought about how large the universe was, how insignificant they all were.

Mink didn’t think that Clear would think that way. Even though Clear thought very little of himself Mink felt that he would try to see the best in the world. After all, only someone who thought like that would ever come to care for Mink as deeply as Clear suggested he did.

But Mink wasn’t going to allow that to persist. It was for Clear’s safety.

“I think I’m in love with you,” Clear said. The statement was quiet as Clear’s speech had been all night. But it was not tentative or weak. It was a declaration and it was thoughtful. It may have also been a little pained, but Mink knew better than to assume that it had anything to do with him specifically. Clear had very much been in love with Aoba, it showed very clearly just how much. Turning to Mink so soon after was bound to stir some feelings of guilt and betrayal in Clear.

“That is unfortunate,” Mink said. He said it as casually as one would take note of the weather.

“Why do you think so?” Clear asked. In his tone was a vulnerability that nearly caused Mink to reach out to him and tell him that it was okay. He cared for him too. It wasn’t what Clear thought. It was only unfortunate that Clear had come to care for someone such as Mink. Last night, Clear wanted to know what a human was. Mink was not. Not even by Clear’s generous description.

Mink turned his eyes to Clear and was met with his mask-less face. He hadn’t moved to put his mask back on. His emotions, his heart were on display for Mink and he knew it. There was no one else that saw Clear without his mask, it was his shield, that much was obvious to Mink. And just the fact that Clear was not going to wear his mask as he awaited this answer that so obviously scared him was enough to deter Mink from ever wanting to break his crystalline heart.

“Because you deserve someone who is not me.”

“I think I should be the one to say that.”

Mink closed his eyes. “No. You are more than many could ever deserve.”

Clear was silent. When Mink opened his eyes he didn’t look directly to Clear. He instead looked to the stars again and noted how they seemed much brighter than they were only a moment ago.

“Let me sing to you.”

Mink turned his eyes to Clear again after he spoke and nodded slowly.

Clear stepped back and it was him this time that closed his eyes. He raised his hands and face to the sky and let a small smile take hold of his lips before he began to sing.

The song was the same that Clear sung last night, the one of jellyfish.

His voice was beautiful as well as he himself. Mink could sense the heart that he put in the song and, for that night, it was reserved only for Mink. It made him feel alive, human in a way that had seemed to have been lost to him. And for a moment Mink didn’t want to die the next night. However, it was fleeting and he pushed the thought aside. He did not want to think of it then when Clear was singing to him so beautifully and stitching his wounds together with his soft voice.

When Clear’s song ended the air seemed to ring with the last notes. Mink felt it send a shiver through the earth as if the entire world could sense Clear’s song, so strong was the emotion that was put into it.

Clear moved to Mink but didn’t touch him, instead stopping when he was still a few inches away from him.

“When we leave tomorrow, promise to come back,” Clear said.

Mink had to stop the surprised quirk of his eyebrow. It was not possible that Clear knew of his plans. He must have simply been worried. They all were, so it was understandable.

“Please,” Clear said quietly. He gripped onto the edge of Mink’s coat. “And I’ll promise to come back to you.”

This was what Mink had been trying to prevent. Clear did not deserve to make empty promises with an empty man. But here they were; all because Mink could not bring himself to tell a lie. All because he could not bring himself to see Clear’s heart break in front of him.

“I promise.” 

Clear smoothed out his hands on Mink’s coat, most of the distress visibly leaving him and causing him to relax. As if the promise would prove Mink’s safety.

“I’ll sing to you again when we come back,” Clear promised. He hesitantly leaned onto the tips of his toes and planted a light kiss on Mink’s cheek. “Goodnight, Mink-san.”

Clear pulled away and retreated back a few steps before stopping again. “I really _will_ come back to you.”

“And I will make a blanket for you.”

Clear seemed confused by the statement but he smiled nonetheless and went back inside.

Mink stayed under the stars for a while longer, just wandering through the narrow streets that surrounded headquarters.

He wondered if Clear would ever forgive him for breaking his promise.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Something I've neglected to mention is that I'm Native American and kinda adopted Mink into my tribe. So I assure you every word that I use in Navajo is real (not the beliefs or customs tho unless I specify) albeit with a botched spelling cause no one I know is literate and I only have rough English translations anyways so that doesn't help with looking them up.  
> Anyways, I assured you of this because Mink's sister's name means "beautiful." Also, so you get the significance of Mink saying "And I will make a blanket for you" Natives usually make something (not strictly blankets I think but just in case I kept it as I was told) for someone who has done them something that has caused them to honor, respect and/or love that person.


	8. Sei

Clear never thought that he would fall for someone again, not after Aoba. It wasn’t just that he thought he would never be able to connect with someone as he had with Aoba. He thought his heart would never heal from the damage he dealt it. He didn’t think he had a heart to damage.

Yet here he was, feeling it in his chest, slowly mending itself together. He felt his heart again after so long.

And he learned that hearts were odd little things. A person could grow one, even if they didn’t want it. They could discover that they had a heart all along. And they could hide their heart from others, keeping it tucked away from the world in the safety of their own walls because hearts were breakable and they took a long time to heal. They might never heal from some wounds.

Hearts were tricky. And Clear wanted Mink to give up just a tiny piece of his heart to Clear because Clear had already given Mink some of his. But because hearts were tricky, Clear didn’t think that that would be an easy feat. Hearts were wild and could not be controlled by anyone, not even by the person that had the heart pounding away in their body. So how was Clear supposed to win someone’s heart, even if it was just a tiny piece; especially if Mink’s heart was one of the hearts that was hidden behind impenetrable walls.

Yes. Hearts were odd. They were strong. They were uncontrollable.

Clear picked up the last two boxes of ammo and hauled it into the main room of Scratch headquarters. There were already boxes and boxes stacked on each other. Some of them were open and being looked through by the members of Scratch. Their weapons were next to them, waiting for their time to come. There were daggers and handguns strewn precariously along the floor and the men beside them laughed and grinned, anticipating the fight that was looming over them.

Clear and Mink were to leave in an hour and the rest of them would come another hour after that.

Clear didn’t want to go. He didn’t want to bring Mink to that dreadful place full of hateful people, robots and memories.

Clear stacked the boxes on top of some others before retreating to the back of the room and waited for the time when Mink would announce that they would leave.

That time didn’t feel very long to Clear, even amongst his swirling thoughts and rising panic. He knew Mink was perfectly capable of caring for himself, especially in a fight, they had fought together after all, Clear had seen how skilled he was. No, he was scared because Mink seemed to be growing more distant since their time outside. Clear didn’t know if it was because of their fight peeking just over the horizon or if it was Clear’s confession.

Mink entered and interrupted Clear’s anxious thoughts. Without having to spare a moment to think of his actions Clear made his way next to Mink as if the two were connected through a strong gravitational force. Clear would not leave Mink’s side of his own volition. Not unless something bigger were to crash into one of them and send them spiraling into the void, the both of them helpless, would Clear ever leave Mink.

“We’re leaving,” Mink said to Clear. He didn’t raise his voice above its usual volume but his words sent ripples through the room as if he had yelled it for all of them to hear.

The men of Scratch said their solemn goodbyes, tinged with the hope that their leader would return to them and survive his dangerous mission.

Clear and Mink left without a word and nothing on them but the clothes on their backs and the hidden dagger in the folds of Mink’s coat. Once they reached outside they would be on their own with nothing but the other to count on and that was more than enough for Clear. All he wanted was to count on someone, to not be alone and just Mink’s presence ensured his wish.

They strode out of Scratch headquarters, with their heads held high. Clear faked confidence the entire way. The truth was, everything about the mission was making him nervous, not just Mink. He didn’t know how he would act once he was in the halls of Oval Tower once more. He didn’t know if his judgment would be impaired from the grief and guilt he was sure would crash on him like the stars would once he set foot in that horrible place. It was scary for him to think that just a place, that he had spent a small part of his life in held so much sway over his confidence.

“You’re nervous,” Mink observed. Clear blinked at him and shook his head.

“Of course not,” Clear said with a light chuckle.

“You’re fidgeting and you’ve forgotten about your mask,” Mink stated.

Clear made a surprised sound and took off his mask. He stuffed it into his pockets and looked at Mink again, hoping his smile would be enough for Mink. It obviously wasn’t but Mink left it alone and waited for Clear to open up himself.

Clear had been picking at the edge of his sleeves and jacket but abandoned the action to trace his face. He felt different than the time he had been in Oval Tower. He hadn’t even felt his face then. He barely spared his face a second thought, he didn’t care that he looked like a monster. He didn’t care that he acted like one too. But now he did and he didn’t know which one was worse.

“You look fine.”

Clear glanced at Mink from the corner of his eye and slowly dropped his hand to his side where he let it swing like a pendulum.

“I’m sorry, I’m just uneasy,” Clear confessed. Mink nodded. He had known all along. “I don’t like it there. It makes me feel as I did before. Inhuman.”

Clear could feel the effects of the Tower from where they were already. They had a long walk ahead of them and Clear wished that they could have taken the truck, just to get the trip over with. But that would have looked suspicious for Clear to suddenly turn up with a rusty, old car and a human still completely in control of himself.

“You’re human.”

Clear smiled softly and looked towards the sky, splashed with oranges and yellows and pinks as the sun set. “Thank you.”

They walked together silently. Mink developed a distant expression like he was looking beyond the Earth, beyond the stars to something more. Something that he was trying to get to that was just beyond his vision, his reach. Clear assumed it was Toue but something about Mink's expression told him it was more than that. It might have been the way he furrowed his brow and looked like he was about to speak to someone only to realize that they were no longer around. Clear had done that after his grandpa had gone to sleep. He would turn to speak to him, only to realize that grandpa would no longer be there to listen. Mink's expression was the same he had worn all those years ago. 

"Why do you hate Toue so much?" Clear asked.

"Because he's evil," Mink said curtly.

"No, it's different with you isn't it?" Clear continued. "What did he do?"

Mink remained silent and evaded the question completely. "You hate him as well and so does everyone in Scratch. Hating Toue isn't uncommon."

Clear nodded and dropped the subject. He wished he didn't have to though. He wished Mink would tell him everything about himself. He wished Mink would whisper them to him under the stars while they stood intimately close and kissed under the sky just as dark as Clear’s damaged heart. He wished that one day Mink would love him enough to divulge his secrets and allow Clear to take some of the weight off his weary shoulders _._

 Mink was gazing off into the distance again, in another time, another place. Clear wondered if maybe he could join him one day.

"My tribe," Mink began. "We would always start our dances at this time. It made the fire look beautiful."

Clear smiled at Mink's willingness to share this information. It wasn't something small, Clear could tell. The way Mink spoke of his family caused his voice to gain a softness that he never wore otherwise. It was full of love, a caress made from his baritone voice.

"Could you show me a dance?" Clear asked quietly, tentatively, afraid that he would break this fragile softness in Mink's face.

His question did not break it. It made the corners of Mink's mouth turn up. He was smiling. It was minuscule but blazed brighter than any giant star in the sky.

"Maybe someday," Mink answered. And with that, the tenderness, the  _smile_  was gone and replaced by something dark. 

Clear reached out and wrapped his fingers around Mink's. The fabric of his glove prevented him from feeling the skin of Mink's hand, no doubt rough from dryness and callouses. Mink snatched his hand back and looked as if he had just remembered that if he flew too close to the sun, he would burn. 

"Mink-san?" Clear asked quietly.

Mink blinked and turned away. "It's not your fault."

They didn't speak again until Platinum Jail towered over them.

"Promise me you'll come back again," Clear said. It was firm, not a question to make sure Mink remembered. It was an order because Clear felt that Mink needed to hear it. Clear needed to hear it as well.

Mink didn't look at Clear; didn't as much as glance at him out of the corner of his eye. "I promise."

Clear knew he was lying.  

* * *

 

Clear grabbed Mink by the arm roughly, playing as if he had all the control, once they spotted their first Alpha. 

"Back so soon?" the Alpha asked sarcastically. He poked around at Mink who just barely contained his urge to punch the Alpha. "He's a hot one; much better looking than the other."

"Hands off," Clear hissed, not even bothering to hide the protectiveness in his tone. 

The Alpha chuckled and instead made it around to Clear. "You were always overly fond of your  _pets."_

Mink sneered at him and the Alpha looked taken aback for a moment before smirking. "He needs to listen to some Grand Music doesn't he? Why don't you try big brother? You were always so busy with  _Aoba-san_  that you never had the pleasure of wiping someone's mind." 

"I'm taking him to Toue first," Clear said, shoving past him and dragging Mink along.

"You better hurry," the Alpha said. "He doesn't look like the submissive type. It's only a matter of time before he'll try to break you."

Clear grit his teeth and continued on, trying not to linger on the Alpha's words and the way Mink snatched his hand away.  _It's not your fault._

Clear breathed and managed to become calm enough to fake a leisurely stroll through the Tower. 

They were left uninterrupted until they reached an abandoned looking corridor. There they were greeted by someone, curled in on themselves, looking ahead with dead eyes. They looked small there, crunched into a ball, barely taking up any space in the little nook they had situated themselves in. They were very thin, their face sunken in and skeletal.  It reminded Clear of how Aoba looked before he died. 

Clear slowed in front of the small person. Mink hardly stopped for him. He frowned in Clear’s direction, thinly veiling the annoyance that he felt from the stall in their march.

The person looked from their distant place and brought their gaze to Clear and Mink. They looked up from underneath their fedora, depression clear in their eyes. They seemed so helpless. They seemed to be even more trapped in these walls than Clear had ever felt. Clear stopped completely and held out his hand but stopped once they made eye contact.

It made Clear feel uneasy. He felt shivers vibrate through his bones, crawl under his skin. He felt exposed and completely naked under the mournful gaze of this person.

_You knew Aoba._

Clear stiffened and the way that Mink shifted his stance to one that was more on guard told Clear that he had heard the voice as well. It was soft and airy as if this person had spent the majority of their life screaming for help that never came. It was eerie having that voice inside of his head.

“Yes,” Clear answered slowly, quietly.

_He was my brother._

Clear blinked. “He never told me he had a brother.”

_He didn’t know._

Mink stepped forward, putting Clear behind his shoulder. “Who are you?”

A pause. _Sei_.

Sei wrapped their arms around their knees and shrunk even more. Their skin seemed almost transparent, as if they weren’t completely there. It was hard to notice, but Sei looked like a ghost.

_I don’t have much time. I was supposed to die a long time ago and this is taking much of my energy._

Sei locked their eyes on Clear’s and a life that Clear had not lived flashed in front of him. Two pale baby boys, connected by the hair cut apart from each other and one, taken away. Experiments, so many experiments done to a young child. Their eyes tampered with, their breath taken away by screams. Pain. So much pain, and then a white room, slowly being filled with childish toys and cheery colors with a single throne set in the middle. The pain was still there, with an indescribable exhaustion. Clear felt as if his every molecule was being dragged towards the Earth with a force a thousand times more than what he was used to.

Mink shifted and Clear broke eye contact with the strange man crouching in front of them because of Mink’s body getting in the way.

 _Kill Toue and I will destroy the Tower._      

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I suck so much. I'm so sorry this is late ;-;  
> This is only half of what I planned to publish but freaking life got in the way and I wanted to give you guys something. We're almost done with this thing so I think I'm going to throw the whole "every Saturday" thing out the window (as if I was doing a good job of keeping that up anyhow) and replace it with "as soon as possible, so much so I plan to have this thing done in a week so I can work on my thesis for school." Let's see how that schedule will work out.


	9. End it In Tears

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I should put a trigger warning here. Mink speaks about suicide and cutting, it's brief but if you're sensitive to that than I would recommend skipping the part after he says his prayer to "He dropped the dagger. He let it clatter to the hard floor..." yeah, that paragraph.

Sei had given no specific instructions of what Clear and Mink were to do other than to kill Toue. Mink would have been fine with it if it weren’t for the very vague _“Kill Toue and I will destroy the Tower.”_ It made him feel like his men and Clear were in danger.

Mink didn’t know if he could trust Sei. He was strange and obviously had shown Clear something that had shaken him and on top of all that, he had disappeared into thin air. And there was power in Sei’s eyes that Mink didn’t trust in the least.

Maybe Mink wouldn’t have spared any of these things a second thought if he was alone. There was someone who was willing to do the hard work and destroy the Tower, leave no trace that Toue or Mink had ever existed. But Clear was with him. And if Sei betrayed them it would be that much harder for Clear to get out of the Tower safely.

Clear stopped and opened his Coil, tapping away at it. Mink raised an eyebrow and Clear answered with looking up. “I’m contacting Scratch and telling them what Sei-san plans to do.”

Mink glanced around. There were obvious cameras everywhere, all of them working and rotating back and forth, little spies under the guise of technology.

“Put it away, Toue will know what you’re up to,” Mink murmured.

“It’s better than you doing it. I can pass it off as checking something,” Clear answered. He continued to send the message, completely disregarding his own safety. Mink had to resist ripping it from his hands and telling him that he was making it even more dangerous for himself.  He didn’t deserve more danger. If there was one person to make it out of the Tower alive, it should be Clear.

After what felt like years, long enough to create a thousand new stars, Clear put his Coil away and let them continue to Toue’s office. Mink tried to calm himself down but every one of the robots that so much as glanced at Clear for half a second put him on edge again. He was ready to fight them if they made a wrong move towards Clear. Even if they had the same face as Clear they were nothing alike and Mink would have no trouble taking them out.

Mink hadn’t been so tense, so protective in a long time. Not since his tribe had been attacked and he had tried to save them. He had run away then. He would not make the same mistake. He would not leave Clear to fight for himself while they were there.

They walked through the Tower completely silent. Clear was more nonchalant than Mink would have thought. But maybe Clear was wearing his mask again. Mink couldn’t see it but the way that Clear was holding himself a little too straight, a little too cheerful told him that while his gas mask was physically in his pocket it was still covering his true face from the world.

When they arrived in the elevator Clear didn’t seem to calm at all, however Mink was able to. They were out of the eyes of the immediate threat. No one could touch Clear until they made it to the top floor. He was safe for the moment.

“I feel bad for Sei-san,” Clear said quietly. “He’s been trapped here since the moment he was born.”

Mink didn’t know how Clear knew but he agreed that such a fate would be awful. Toue had certainly done his best to make everyone his putrid touch had reached, hate him.

The elevator ride was far too short. The monotonous white that presented itself throughout the entire building seemed calmer on the elevator. It was subdued and isolated, cut off from the rest of the disgustingly white walls of the Tower. Mink wondered briefly if he could lock Clear inside before they made it to Toue’s room. Mink could pretend that he had tricked Clear into taking him there and that he actually had nothing to do with Mink other than the sad fact that his lonely heart had unwisely decided to become attached.

Mink chanced a glance at Clear and his determined face. His brow was furrowed slightly, his lips turned down into a frown. He was angry; angry enough to rival the anger that Mink felt at the moment. Although, Mink’s anger was subdued, it had years to fester and boil in his veins to the point that it had become a part of him and he felt no different than he did any other day. Only when he was with Clear would that anger ever become a dull throbbing in his heart. He was also used to that feeling.

The elevator dinged cheerfully, unfitting to the setting that it revealed once the doors slowly slid open. Again, more white and a long hallway that led directly to large, red double doors, taunting them, daring them to come closer and enter. Clear didn’t hesitate to make his way directly towards them.

Mink grabbed his wrist and held him firmly in place. “Stay here. Actually, leave the Tower.”

Clear yanked his wrist back. “No.”

“Don’t be stubborn,” Mink said.

“You can’t tell me to do that,” Clear whispered, which was much more intimidating than a shout from him would ever be. “Toue tortured Sei-san for his entire life and he’s killed so many others. He kidnapped Aoba-san and I and worked on me until I become something I did not want to be. So don’t tell me that I cannot fight.”

“And what are you going to do if he gets a hold of you again?” Mink asked. “Will you return to his side?”

Clear winced and replied calmly. “Don’t say that just to make me leave.”

It was then that Mink realized Clear had a profound understanding of Mink that he did not think he possessed. In his eyes, Mink was glass; transparent and easily breakable. Mink wondered how Clear was ever able to see past the cracks.

“I won’t leave,” Clear continued. “I promised, remember? I will come back to you.”

Mink, unable to do anything more to deter Clear stood in silence before saying softly, “I’m sorry for dragging you along.”

“I came because _I_ chose to,” Clear said. “Do not feel bad for something you didn’t do.”

Mink wanted to elaborate. He knew Clear came to the Tower because he chose to. Clear was his own being with his own thoughts and feelings. He was perfectly capable of staying behind if he wanted to, as he was perfectly capable of coming, despite Mink’s wishes. No, Mink was sorry that Clear had fallen in love with him. It was not fair to Clear. Mink was truly sorry for dragging Clear into his thoughts and making him think that he could be in love with a man like Mink without getting hurt again.

Clear grabbed his arm and dragged him to Toue’s office. Their moment was over. It was time for Mink to finally fulfill his long-standing wish for revenge.

Clear pushed open the doors after a brief knock. He revealed another white room, with no furniture other than a large desk set towards the back of the room. And behind that, gazing out of a large window to his _kingdom_ stood Toue.

“Welcome back,” he said smoothly. He turned to them, an infuriatingly lazy smile across his face.

“I found someone,” Clear announced.

Toue turned his gaze to Mink and his smile warped to something more amused. “It is good to see you again, Mink-kun.”

Clear blanched, clearly not expecting them to have known each other. Mink was slightly surprised as well. He had not looked too different to how he did at that moment when Toue had killed his tribe. But then he possessed fewer bags under his eyes, less muscle, less hair, and more tears streaming down his face and clouding his vision. But he didn’t think that Toue would remember him despite his lack of change in his looks. He didn’t think that Toue would have cared enough about one escaped person that he was planning on killing anyway.

“Don’t look so surprised,” Toue said cheerfully. “I could not forget you. After I killed your tribe you were the only one left to give me the recipe for your herbs.”

The casual way that Toue mentioned killing his tribe lit the fire in his veins. It caused his face to harden and his lips to pull back in barely contained rage.

Clear glanced at Mink, shock and sadness all wrapped up in his eyes and gone in a flash as he remembered that he should be pretending that this wasn't part of the plan, that it was a coincidence. Toue noticed though and smiled again, a brilliant smile like he owned the world and everyone in that room.

"You may stop pretending that you aren't broken, Alpha," Toue said. "I knew the moment you asked for an extension out there."

"You-" Clear began.

Toue waved at him, as if he was swatting away a fly. "It hardly matters. You've brought a nice present with you. I knew it would be interesting."

Interesting, he said. It seemed that controlling the entirety of an island was too boring for him. That thought disgusted Mink. Frivolity like that was something that corrupted leaders and everyone underneath them. It was the poison underneath laughs and jokes, waiting to turn something important into nothing at all.

Clear stepped back. He was unfazed by the new information and Mink had the feeling that Clear expected Toue's distrust for a long time. The thought must have crept up on him on late nights or maybe it had stuck there in the back of his mind the second he regained himself. Maybe he always knew that he wouldn't be able to replicate his old self's cruel personality, if it was even cruel in the first place. Clear had a habit of demonizing himself and it warped his thoughts and words at times. There was no way for Mink to tell if he was lying about how he had acted only based on his word.

"Now," Toue said, turning to Mink, all business with the guise of friendly openness across his face. "If you gave me those herbs I might not kill you and the Alpha will be destroyed with minimal pain on its part."

"He has nothing to do with this," Mink said calmly.

"You were brought here by the Alpha weren't you?" Toue asked. Mink didn't answer, only stared coldly at the man who had killed his family.

"He is not the one who can make your herbs," Mink said eventually. "And neither can I. Even if I could, what makes you think I would ever give it to you?" 

"I can destroy you," Toue paused, flicking his eyes to Clear. "And  _him_  in a second. I'm sure none of us here would like that. Far too messy." 

"Clear, leave," Mink said. It was best if Clear got out before things got violent, before he was put in even more danger than he already was. Mink wanted to protect Clear and it was a burden that he didn't think he was capable of possessing again. But it seemed that it was just a thing humans did, care for people, and he had somehow picked it up from Clear,  _for_  Clear. 

"I will not leave you," Clear cried, silently pleading to stay.

"Your absence will help me. Please," Mink said, pleading back, not heard in his voice or seen in his eyes that were still fixed on Toue or a change in his posture but with the twitch of his hand towards Clear and with the single word he hadn't uttered to anyone in years because he didn't think he needed them.

Clear grit his teeth and backed away slowly, eyes trained on Mink. 

Mink hoped it would be simple for Clear to forget about him. It was a prayer that Mink obviously knew would never come true, not with the way that Clear was looking at him, as if Mink needed protecting too because he was just as precious as Clear. But it didn't quell the hope that Mink always carried with him when he found himself becoming closer to people like the members of Scratch and Clear; the hope that he could die and leave people behind with no damage to their hearts. 

"I will come back."

Clear, with all of his feelings, all of his love ingrained into every sound used to produce those words and every look at Mink like he was worthy of that love, left with the hurried push and slam of the door.

"You two are quite troublesome," Toue observed. Mink didn't say anything, didn't move an inch. "Are you sure you wouldn't consider handing over your tribe's secrets? Not even for your own guaranteed safety?"

It was a slap in the face. Toue knew fully well that Mink didn't give a damn about his own safety and stating that he cared for it more than his own tribe was cruel. It didn't hurt but it burned an angry shade of red into the backs of his eyes and ground his teeth together.

"Even if I did have it, I would never hand it over," Mink growled.

"That's unfortunate. Ah, well I'm sure Clear would make fine scrap metal," Toue said. He maneuvered around his desk and leaned on the edge of it, as if he didn't have to worry that someone out for his blood was standing in the same room as him, alone. As if he hadn't threatened the only thing Mink had left.

"You know why I'm here and it's not to give you a recipe that doesn't even exist," Mink stated.

"Ah, yes, your tribe," Toue said, leaning against his desk, cane set in front of him. "It's a shame what happened to them. I express my greatest condolences."

That was it. Mink reached into his coat and brought out the serrated dagger that had hid patiently at his side until that moment. It wouldn't wait any longer, it was hungry for blood.

Toue laughed, looking delighted at the sight of the weapon that would eventually bring about his death.

Mink gripped it tighter, the metal of the blade flashing coldly from the bright lights of the room.

"If you would like to kill me then I would just like to torture you a little longer," Toue said, a gleam in his eyes and a gruesome twist to the corners of his mouth, showing off the true insanity that he must have kept tucked away in the darkest parts of him.

"You won't die, you can't die. Ever."

The words shot a lance through Mink's mind. It was painful, not just the power behind those words but the implications that Mink would have to live the rest of his life with the knowledge that everyone he had ever loved, everyone he had ever known had died. And he could not join them. 

Toue laughed as he saw Mink hunch over in pain, one eye squeezed shut and his teeth grit together. The migraine took hold of him and he felt as if he had been stabbed in the head, that mere words were not the only cause for his physical pain but something cold and hard working its way through the crevices of his every thought and memory. For a moment Mink thought that this was how he was going to die, the pain was so great. Toue must have had someone sneak behind him and stab him before he had even realized. He was dying.

A memory forced itself out of the depths of his mind. It was a memory that he kept locked away in a precious safe for his own protection because whenever the padlock was broken and the safe opened Mink would be in pain.

His sister’s face swum in his mind, but it wasn’t only her it was his entire tribe with their faces fuzzy from the years Mink had to live without them. Nizhoni’s face was the clearest, as if a spot light was shining on her pretty face. But her expression, normally radiant and mirthful was twisted and stained with tears. It was only a face she wore at the saddest of times, when someone died, their elders, or their shaman on that hot summer’s day.

 _“Why would you kill yourself?”_ Nizhoni sobbed.

_Why, why why._

The voices stopped their shouting and Nizhoni’s face was replaced by Clear’s in less than a second. He was smiling and his crystal eyes glistened with so much emotion Mink wondered how he ever convinced himself he was inhuman.

_“Promise to come back. Please. And I’ll promise to come back to you.”_

_“I promise.”_

_“Don’t break your promise and I won’t break mine.”_

Clear tilted his head up and kissed him. Mink couldn’t feel it physically but the mere thought that it was there reminded Mink of whom he was, who he could be. He was a broken man, yes, but he was capable of happiness, especially if Clear’s lips stayed pressed against his and he taught him more of what it meant to be human, until it was undisguised from the both of them.

Mink was not dying. Not from Toue.

He breathed in deeply, the air hissing past his teeth as he straightened himself. Toue looked surprised and mildly annoyed at the new strength that Mink had dredged up.

“You shouldn’t be having such an easy time doing that,” Toue said.

“It doesn’t matter,” Mink said. He remembered the talk that Tae had with Aoba what felt like years and years ago, about his power with his voice and his influence over people. “That was Scrap wasn’t it?”

“Very observant, Mink-kun,” Toue said, clapping his hands together a couple of times before plastering on his smirk and dropping his hands down back to his cane.

Mink’s muscles were still stiff, still too tense for him to attempt to lunge at Toue and end it all. He would have to wait a little longer and use Clear’s words as a shield against any attempts at Scrap that Toue would make as Mink began to recover.

“Are you sure you wouldn’t want to hand those herbs over? I could raise you up until you’ll be too happy to even miss your tribe,” Toue offered.

“I wouldn’t hand anything over to you,” Mink snarled. He tested himself by straightening completely and was only met with an incessant pounding in his head and a faint dizziness that he was able to force down.

“Where do you people learn of such resilience? It’s admirable, really, how much you all want to _live_ and protect,” Toue said. He smiled again and took on a calmer posture.

Mink steadied himself, spread his feet apart, squared his shoulders and looked ahead as he felt himself regain the fuel that he always felt deep in his bones, the anger that drove him all the way to the top floor of Oval Tower and in front of the man who was willing to take everything from him.

“My resilience is from everything my family has taught me of strength and every word that Clear has said to me and every promise he has foolishly made for my sake,” Mink said.

He took a step forward, testing himself. He was met with no resistance other than a small ringing in his ears and a sudden pain that shot through his head, but it was miniscule and easily ignored.

Mink couldn’t help but chuckle to himself, his lips twisting into a gruesome smile as he finally closed the distance between himself and Toue.

It was over quickly, with the blade sinking into flesh and the spray of blood over Mink’s hand and Toue’s torso. With the flash of Toue’s teeth in a depraved smile and the grind of Mink’s he felt everything he had lived for for _years_ go limp and fall to the floor with a dull thud.

There was no source of revenge anymore. There was nothing to prevent Mink from clutching at his shoulder and looking sadly at the ground as he finally let the feelings he had been tamping down for so long grip his heart and drag him down.

As if the Tower itself felt Mink finally falling down, down, down it began to tremble, causing bits of ceiling to rain down and flecks of gray dust to coat his clothes. Mink knew it was his time and with a heavy heart he began to pray.

“My brothers, my parents, and the companions I passed my days with. The spirits of the deceased, the father becomes the son, the mother becomes the greenery. I have now reached the end of my long journey. I pray that our blood stained land will be purified. And I pray that the burned forest will have a gust of life blown through it. I will now depart on the second journey. I will return our sacred tools back to the great ancestors. Wait for me... the spirits of the ones who lovingly watched over me. Before long... I will be there.”

Mink closed his eyes and shifted the dagger in his hand until it was hovering over his wrist. He flexed his hand, made sure that his hold on the dagger was tight. He pressed the blade to his wrist, and found that he was unable to bring himself to push down hard enough to break skin. He growled in frustration and tried again. His hand didn’t move as he wanted it to and Toue’s blood was being washed off of the blade and onto Mink, staining his skin red with the blood he desperately wanted to be his.

He grit his teeth and tried again. Nothing, not a scratch was made on his skin.

All it was would be three slashes, Mink told himself, one down each of his wrists and one across his throat. But he couldn’t do it.

And it wasn’t because of Toue’s words. Those weren’t the words bouncing around inside of his head; they weren’t the words he was thinking of whenever he so much as made a dent in his wrist.

Clear’s words were preventing him from doing it. Thinking of his face twisted up like Nizhoni’s, standing over the ruins of the Tower, where he knew Mink’s body lay was something he did not want to put Clear through.

He dropped the dagger. He let it clatter to the hard floor before following it with a painful collision of his knees and the marble floor.

The ground shook underneath him and he heard the door opening somewhere in the back of his mind. He felt like crying. He felt like falling into the void and never coming out because he had done everything he ever wanted and learned that there was even more he wanted in less than a minute and he felt himself becoming torn in two.

He felt that if he didn’t die he would be betraying his family. But he felt if he did kill himself, end it _finally_ , he would be betraying Clear. And both of those betrayals were equally painful and he certainly couldn’t avoid both.

Arms were being wrapped around him and it took him a moment to realize that they were Clear’s.

“Are you alright?” Clear asked, eyes frantically raking over his body and settling over the blood on his arm and shirt.

“It’s Toue’s,” Mink explained tiredly.

Clear crushed him into a hug and in a moment of weakness, Mink let his walls fall down and he clutched onto Clear’s lab coat. He turned his face and buried it in Clear’s soft hair and felt tears become absorbed by it. Clear must have noticed but said nothing and held Mink as they felt the Tower collapse around them.

“We should leave,” Clear said gently.

He stood and held his hand out to Mink.

Mink hesitated before taking Clear’s hand and allowing himself to be helped.

It was over. Toue was dead and Clear could take him home.         

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I stole some lines from the game. These aren't mine:  
> "I'm sorry for dragging you along."  
> "You won't die, you can't die. Ever."  
> And that really freaking long prayer that Mink recited.


	10. In This Love Forever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is smut in this chapter. If it makes you uncomfortable it's from Mink removing Clear's scarf to when Clear is "tracing constellations on Mink's skin" after three little words of fluffy dialogue!

Clear wished he knew more of space, because there were so many more things to learn, so many more metaphors to dream up in his head that would help guide along his thinking of things that were as eternal and mysterious as the universe they lived in. A lot of things would remain mysteries, a lot of things would have unanswerable questions and riddles without a point. But Clear was sure that he was human, even though people like Toue, like himself would try to convince him otherwise. And he knew he loved Mink.

They were simple things really, but they held the same feeling of gazing down into infinity looking at the stars gave him. He would love Mink forever and he would be human until he stopped functioning anymore. Yes, he was built like a robot with cogs and metal but he was capable of love, god, he really was. 

Mink took his hand and Clear hoisted him up, steadying him when he swayed. Mink didn't stay weak for long. He had shed his tears, he had stood up again, he could stand on his own now. He didn't need Clear to do it for him, but that didn't mean he was unwanted by Mink's side. 

The building grumbled underneath them, growled like a beast and they ran away from it. They made it to the elevator and let out relieved puffs of air when the doors slid open and welcomed them in. They could hopefully make it down without it breaking on them in the last second and they could get out of the Tower and go home. Well, Scratch headquarters wasn't home but it was close, close as Clear was ever going to get for the moment. He would make a new home with Mink some other time, the most important thing, at the moment, was leaving and making sure everyone else was also headed out.

Mink, as if reading his mind, sent a hasty message on his Coil before the doors of the elevator were opening and releasing them.

They ran and dodged past bits of falling ceiling and jumped over the debris that was already piling on the floor. They kept perfect pace with each other, never letting the other fall behind because it was already their second nature to make sure the other was going to be okay. 

They heard distant shouts ahead of them as the members of Scratch fled the Tower. Evidence of the short fight was scattered about. Broken Alphas were slumped over like puppets and the Doberman Allmates were torn to pieces. Metal parts were flung everywhere and Clear winced looking at them. He didn't let his gaze linger on the carnage any longer.

"Damn it!"

Clear stopped in his tracks at the familiar voice of Koujacku. He was distressed, not that far away from where they were at the moment. Mink scanned the area, he had heard him too.

"You aren't going to leave him," Mink observed. Clear didn't answer, Mink already knew. 

Clear darted through the Tower, feeling the ground move beneath his feet. His eyes flicked around, absorbing as much of his surroundings as was possible. White, white, white, falling debris, and a red kimono.

Clear ran towards Koujacku.

"What's wrong?" he called. Koujacku raised his head and waved him down.

"Noiz is stuck," Koujacku explained.

"What's up?" Noiz said casually, underneath a large slab of ceiling. 

Koujacku tugged helplessly on an edge of the debris, gritting his teeth. It hardly moved and he hit it in frustration, cursing under his breath. Clear gently moved him to the side and braced himself. Mink placed himself opposite of Clear and steadied the debris as he lifted it and freed Noiz.

As soon as Noiz was free and the debris was safely flung away from him he attempted to stand before a look of surprise and pain crossed his face. He fell to the ground and huffed in annoyance. Koujacku didn't hesitate to loop an arm beneath his knees and across his back before straightening.

"I thought I would be the one to carry _you_ around in your ancient age," Noiz stated. 

Koujacku only chuckled and nodded towards the others, indicating they were ready to go.

The Tower was shaking even more on their way out. The walls were caved in and Clear thought if he poked them they would come crumbling down.

They hurried through, the distant shouts of Scratch members led them to the exit where they found the group waiting for them. They waved and Clear headed towards them, making sure that Mink matched his every stride.

They crashed through the doors and heard the building fall to nothing behind them as they kept running, now with every remaining member of Scratch behind them. Tori had flown from somewhere and beat his wings above Mink's head as they ran and ran until they thought it would be okay to stop.

They turned there, watching the once majestic Tower crumble in on itself, metal and glass raining down from upper levels. They could still hear grumbles and creaks as it fell, still could feel the slight tremor under their feet.

It was then that Clear realized that it was really over. There was nowhere that he could look to remind him of all the horrible things he had done to Aoba, save for the darkest parts of his mind in the dead of night. Toue was dead, and Mink could relax, hopefully. Hopefully everything that made up the black holes in the center of their galaxies were under control and they could finally depend on it to guide them along for the future, to further their development and provide gravity. They wouldn't forget, because Aoba, Mink's tribe was, _is_ , a very large part of them. If they ignored an important thing like that, and kept going they might someday find themselves caught in their black hole and crushed. It was best to never forget and to know that more was to come. 

Finally, slowly they began to leave the Tower behind.

"There are three missing," Mink said before they got too far.

His statement was met with grim expressions and shaking heads. 

Clear felt himself grow teary-eyed and moved closer to Mink, to the point that he had to make sure not to trip him up. He was suddenly, acutely aware that things could have gone much worse and he should be grateful for Mink being alive.

* * *

 

Their journey back to Scratch was weighed heavily with somber silence. There were congratulatory pats on the back and proud smiles that only lasted a moment until they remembered there were three men missing who should be laughing and celebrating with them and until they looked past the beds of the trucks and saw Toue's destruction that would never be repaired. There was a horrible smell lying over the air and bodies were in the streets, except they weren't zombies they were actually dead. They had all probably starved to death or died of thirst. It was gruesome and made all the more horrible with the knowledge that their home was nothing more than empty buildings and bodies that were dead long before they stopped functioning.

"Mink-san," Clear said quietly. The others in their group had dispersed, some of them speaking of alcohol, others wanting sleep. "Can I stay with you?"

Mink nodded and continued on to his room.

When they arrived, Mink was quick to shed his coat and his cuffs. He hesitated for a moment before taking his contacts out as well and Clear studied his eyes closely. They were a wonderful gold color that Clear thought suited Mink more than the cold blue of his contacts. Clear was able to glimpse more of Mink, he was able to see the sorrow that used to be masked by the shield of blue. 

"You have beautiful eyes," Clear stated.

Mink only stared at him for a moment before saying, "Take your mask off."  

Clear complied, hardly having to spare it a thought, the days when he was scared of Mink seeing beneath the mask were far behind him.

He stuffed the mask into his pocket before meeting Mink's gaze. He smiled and stepped forward, resting his hands on Mink's broad shoulders. 

Mink paused for a moment, his hand slowly making its way to the air, before he sighed and cupped Clear's cheek. Clear immediately leaned into the touch. 

And they kissed as a million stars burst and reformed. They kissed as an entirely new universe formed around them, leaving them the only two galaxies in its existence. 

Clear opened his mouth and slid his tongue along Mink's. He sighed and wrapped his arms around his neck, feeling like it would be okay. 

Mink broke away from Clear for just long enough to say quietly. "Thank you." 

Clear didn't have to ask what he should be thanked for. Seeing Mink on the ground in Toue's office, holding him up as he cried was enough explanation for him. And Clear knew that Mink was about to kill himself. Sei, with his last bit of strength, came to him and told him that he should save Mink from himself. Clear didn't waste a second in going back to Toue's office. He didn't have to be told that Mink was grateful for him only being there, maybe not to stop him, but to physically tell him that it would be okay.

Mink gently unwound the scarf that always adorned Clear and let it fall to the ground, shortly followed by Clear's coat. 

They undressed each other slowly, wordlessly. Clear laid down on Mink's bed, spreading his legs and waiting for Mink to come back from his decorated table.

When Mink returned, the bed creaked under his weight and Clear shifted until his legs were framing Mink's hips. Mink unscrewed the lid of a can, the metallic squeak the only sound in the room other than their anticipatory breaths.

Mink slicked his fingers in the gel and moved his hand lower and lower before stopping.

"This is okay with you?" he asked. Clear nodded and reached out until he was gripping Mink's arm.

"If it's with you Mink-san, then I'm okay," Clear said. "I want you."

They kissed sloppily, all tongue and teeth with none of the slowness that was there when they were lifting each other's shirts and caressing skin. Mink was still gentle with Clear, despite their frantic kissing. He pressed a finger into Clear, taking it slowly, swallowing his whimpers and gasps with a bruising press of lips. When Clear began moving his hips, looking for _more_ , Mink slipped in another finger, just as slowly, just as gently. 

The third finger came as the others did and before long Clear was bucking his hips and grabbing Mink's arms hard enough to create bruises. 

" _Please_ ," Clear whimpered. He arched his spine and said it again, quieter. "Please."

Mink thrusted his fingers once more before removing them to slick his cock.

Clear squirmed and spread his legs wider as he watched Mink. He was in love with his body: his well-defined muscles, his dark skin, his broad shoulders, his thick cock. It made him even more impatient to be connected with Mink, to feel him pulse inside him and to coax lewd noises from his mouth. 

Mink lined himself up, pausing for a moment before pushing his head past Clear's ring. Clear gasped and scrabbled for something to hold- the blankets, his hair, Mink's shoulders. 

Mink rocked his hips, burying himself a little deeper. Clear closed his eyes and  _moaned._

He loved the slight burn and the stretch that came with being filled. He loved the feeling of two galaxies merging, moving together in a beautiful celestial dance. 

Once Mink's hips hit the back of Clear's thighs he stopped and leaned over. He cupped Clear's cheek and looked into his eyes before swooping down and kissing him.

Clear moved his hands down Mink's back, hoping to absorb every sensation given to him. He wanted to memorize the slide of Mink's tongue against his and the nip of teeth on his bottom lip. He wanted to learn every dip and curve of Mink's muscled body and how every patch of skin felt underneath the pads of his fingers. He wanted to feel the pulsing heat inside of him forever because being with Mink made him burn hotter than any blue star in the known universe and beyond.

Clear wiggled his hips and wrapped his legs around Mink. "More," he whispered in between kisses. 

Mink's first thrust was slow, more exploratory than not. Each new thrust elicited a louder sound from Clear and a different angle of Mink's hips until one thrust sent a wave of intense pleasure ripping through Clear's body. He tensed and dug his fingernails into Mink's back, opening and closing his mouth, unable to make a sound other than a shaky exhalation. 

"Mink-sa-an," Clear gasped. He curled into Mink, his head basically rested on his shoulder and his legs and arms were wrapped around Mink's body. "F-faster."

He turned his head and caught Mink's lips in his as he felt Mink's hips stutter for a moment, before carrying out his breathy order. 

All other sounds but their panting and Mink's grunts were lost in the vacuum of space as Clear let the rest of the world drop away into oblivion. There was nothing more than those sounds, the smell of cinnamon and the feeling of Mink's body on top of him, inside of him.

His release was met with a supernova. It blasted through his body and flashed brilliant colors behind his eyelids and heat throughout his body as he shouted and gripped on to Mink so he wouldn't be blown away.

Mink continued to pound into him for just a little longer, hips stuttering, moaning and loudly grunting until he came inside of Clear.

Clear didn't want Mink to move just yet so he kissed him breathless before finally letting his heavy limbs slide back down to the bed. Mink slid out of him, leaving Clear feeling a little empty, before he lied down right next to Clear who pressed his face into Mink's chest and sighed in content.

"I love you," Clear said quietly, tracing constellations on Mink's skin.

Mink didn't respond in words. Instead, he hugged Clear closer to him and tilted his head until they were kissing deeply. Clear relaxed as Mink peppered kisses along his neck and collarbone.

Mink eventually fell asleep in Clear's arms.

* * *

 

Clear spent the entire night watching Mink sleep. It was something that he found fascinating, sleep. He wondered what caused Mink's eyes to flick underneath his eyelids or his fingers to twitch slightly against wherever they were resting on Clear's body.

Clear didn't need sleep, but he decided he loved it. He loved it because the scowl on Mink's face would soften and the creases perpetually between his eyebrows would smooth out until he looked less angry, less sad. And he would love sleep because he loved seeing Mink relaxed, if not happy. He loved Mink.

Mink eventually woke from tepid touches and shy kisses that fluttered over his skin. 

"Good morning, Mink-san," Clear said. Mink hummed in agreement. "What were you dreaming of?"

Dreaming was something that Clear was unfamiliar with. It was something he would never experience, therefore he was curious about it and he would have liked to know what it was Mink dreamed of. It might open him up to Clear even more because while they had been intimate there was still more of each other that they didn't know of. Clear wanted to know it all.

Mink brushed away some hair from Clear's face and stroked his cheek with a thumb.

"My home," he said eventually. "And you."

Clear smiled, all the love of the world behind his eyes. He was programmed to understand dreams as fickle things that didn't really have a set pattern but he knew the intimacy in those words, to admit that you were thinking of someone, even in sleep.

"If I could dream I think I would dream of you too," Clear stated with a wide smile. 

Mink was fully awake at that point and his eyes searched Clear's face for a moment before he huffed out a breath.

"I'm going to go back," he said.

"I'm going with you," Clear said immediately. 

Mink chuckled. It was quiet and hesitant, as if he hadn't done it in a long time and he probably hadn't.

"We could certainly make arrangements," Mink said. 

Clear latched on to the word  _we._ It sounded nice to him. Mink had never referred to anyone and himself as  _we_. It was always, whoever and I. But Clear had managed to make it to Mink's arms and earn his heart, his  _we._

"I love you."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the poorly written smut, I still have some work to do in that field >_>


	11. Epilogue: We Belong

Clear's Coil rang as Mink and he took a short walk outside of their home. It was nice out, the breeze rustled the leaves and their hair. The weather was always nice where they lived, most of the time the sky was clear and even in the winter months, after it snowed, there was hardly a cloud in the sky. When it  _did_  rain or snow, Clear and Mink would spend the day or two inside until the weather blew over. Those were lazy days and Clear loved them so much, because they would curl up near the fire and sit peacefully, listening to the other breath and running hands sensually over each other's bodies without another thought in the world. But the sky was clear and they were going on one of their walks, which Clear loved just as much as warming up next to the fire.

Clear brought his wrist up and read the contact name flashing over the screen. It was Koujacku.

They paused their walk for a moment as Clear answered the Coil and Koujacku's and Noiz's faces flashed in front of them.

"Hello!" Clear greeted cheerfully, with a large smile. 

"Hey," Koujacku and Noiz replied, with varying degrees of mirth. But both of them seemed pleased to see the two again. They didn't meet in real life anymore. Noiz, Koujacku and Tae were all in Germany. Koujacku had taken Tae with them as she no longer had Aoba to be there with her and no one should have been left on Midorijima. There was nothing there and, according to a cover story Clear and Mink had heard on the news, the population of Midorijima had been wiped out from a mysterious disease that had, thankfully, not made it beyond the island.

Clear almost wanted to go to the news station and tell them what really happened. What Sei really sacrificed himself for and why Aoba and so many others died. But he settled on a vow to see them again. He couldn’t leave Aoba or his grandfather anyhow.

"How are you?" Koujacku asked, polite as always.

"We're well!" Clear answered. He laced his fingers with Mink's and leaned into him just a little bit. "How about you two?"

"Horrible. It's been a year and Koujacku still can't wrap his head around getting papers to me on time," Noiz said and was promptly met with a smack on the back of the head. "Ow!"

"I think he means we're good as well," Koujacku said with a smile.

"Where's Tae-san?" Clear asked.

"At home. We're both at the office right now, bored out of our skulls," Koujacku explained.

"What are  _you_ up to? Your signal's shit," Noiz said. 

"We were taking a walk," Mink answered. 

"It's so nice out here!" Clear added. "We always go on walks whenever we can!"

"I don't know how you can live in seclusion like that. I need the sounds of the city all around me, it gets too quiet otherwise," Koujacku said.

"It's peaceful," Mink said.

There was some rustling on Noiz and Koujacku's side of the call. Their attention was diverted away from the screen for a moment, Noiz answered some questions in German, acting perfectly professional and nothing like the kid they knew on Midorijima. When whoever they couldn't see was gone Noiz and Kouajacku turned back to them with sighs.

"It seems we have to be going," Noiz said.

"We'll call you again some other time," Koujacku promised.

They parted ways with goodbyes and smiles before they continued on their walk as before. Clear sometimes missed those two, since there was no way to get to see them in real life they were condemned to getting bits and pieces of each other from the video feeds on their Coils. They were really the only ties Clear had back to Midorijima, besides Mink, but Mink never really belonged there as Clear had come to find out when they moved. He was best here, in his  _actual_  home. He could gaze out the window and tell Clear about all his could-have-beens and be hugged by Clear from behind because Clear wanted to assure him that maybe one good thing had come out of all that suffering. It usually worked and Mink would offer him a rare, small smile in return.

It was good seeing Mink so comfortable and relaxed in a way he had never been in Midorijima.

Clear slipped his hand gently from Mink's and skipped ahead, whistling at a bird whenever he spotted one perched in a tree. 

Mink watched him and was struck with another moment when he remembered that life was definitely worth living. These thoughts always came into his mind when he was watching Clear- whether it be smiling or gazing contently into the sunset in their backyard or just standing in front of the stove, cooking Mink's dinner- and they became more frequent seemingly everyday. 

Mink began to remember how it felt to not be trapped underground and he remembered how much the stars had meant to him.

Clear turned to him with a radiant smile and pointed at one of the birds he was observing. "Doesn't that one look like Koujacku-san's Allmate?"

Mink spared it a glance, noting its red feathers and small frame. He nodded. "It does."

Mink didn't waste another moment looking at the bird and turned his attention to Clear who had taken up whistling to the bird, occasionally interrupted by his own giggling. He circled the tree and studied the bird further before it took off in a flurry of feathers. Clear watched it with a smile until it disappeared into the trees. 

Clear returned to Mink's side and intertwined their fingers.

"I like being with you."

He always wore his heart on his sleeve these days.

Min squeezed his hand and halted their progress for just long enough to kiss him. 

"I love you," Mink said. Clear beamed. While Clear told the world what he felt, without much hesitation, Mink did not. However, Clear was, slowly but surely, getting him to say more and feel like it was okay to open his heart.

"I love you too," Clear said. His smile softened and he rested his hand over Mink's- the one cupping his cheek.

Whenever they looked into each other's eyes, as they were then, they saw all of the universe. It was a perfectly chaotic swirl of beauty that rotated around the two of them.

Clear tugged gently on Mink's sleeve. "Let's go home."

The rest of their walk was slower than usual. Clear watched everything around him, not a single rustle of leaves escaped his notice. But Mink watched Clear without letting a single flutter of eyelashes or stray hair go unnoticed.

Their home was tucked away in the small forest. Clear had fallen in love with it instantly and each time they passed that old birch that seemed like a portal to their home, Clear felt overwhelmed with happiness as he had the first day they had arrived. Each time he saw it again, he remembered he was  _home_. Mink and their cozy cabin had become everything to him. 

They ascended the creaky porch stairs and stepped inside. The door needed oil on its hinges but Clear didn't want to change it. It was a familiar sound that always came every day when Mink returned from work or when they came back from a walk together. Mink didn't want to change it either.

"Are you hungry?" Clear asked as he removed his shoes.

"No," Mink answered. He sat on the couch, hoping to get some reading done. Clear, however, had other plans.

He sat on Mink's lap and kissed him deeply. Mink didn't hesitate for a moment to return it.

"I love you," Clear whispered every time they broke apart for a moment.

Mink held Clear's face in between his hands, the tips of his fingers brushed Clear's soft hair. Clear trailed his hands everywhere he could reach, he loved the feeling of Mink. It sent a small shiver down Mink's spine.

Mink's long hair, no longer styled in dreadlocks, tickled the sides of their faces as Clear dragged them both down until Mink was lying on top of him on the couch.

"I want you," Clear muttered.

Mink kissed him. "Let's try something different."

Clear nodded frantically before catching Mink's lips between his again. 

* * *

 

 

Their afternoon ended with the both of them lying in bed, Mink's hand-made blankets piled on top of them. Clear traced his jellyfish constellations across Mink's skin as he did after every time they had sex or made love.

"You're okay?" Clear asked again.

Mink brushed the hair in Clear's face away. "I'm not made of glass. I'm okay."

Clear hummed happily and kissed Mink again. Their lips slid together effortlessly, as if they were made to kiss the other.

"I have something for you, achenne," Mink said after a few minutes of shared breaths. Clear made a questioning noise and watched as Mink slowly got out of their bed. He opened a drawer in his dresser and came back with a dream catcher. 

It wasn't traditional. The leather that wrapped around the outside was turquoise but it was only a half circle. The leather and feathers dangled from the bottom, as was traditionally done, but with the half circle shape it looked like a jellyfish.

Clear took it carefully in his hands and smiled brightly. The Sun could never compare to the brightness of his smile or the warmth that settled in Mink's chest every time he saw it.

"Thank you," Clear said softly. When Mink came back to their bed Clear embraced him and refused to let go.

Mink chuckled softly and stroked Clear's hair until he fell asleep.   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I purposefully merged their perspectives (with that whole two galaxies becoming one metaphor in mind) so I hope it wasn't too terribly confusing. Thank you all so much for giving kudos/commenting/reading! It was fun writing this, I hope you all have enjoyed it as well!
> 
> Achenne- my dear one


End file.
